Friday, January 30, 2009

Madame Zelda Presents Her 2009 Predictions

What providence that I should return to the land of Seekerville in time to share wisdom for the new year. As you no doubt fondly remember from my last visit, I always I like to start out the day with a little gypsy humor.

NOTICE : 'The Clairvoyant Society will not have its usual meeting this week, due to unforeseen circumstances.'

Okay, well I laughed.

This prediction gig is a lot work. Anyone can shake the crystal ball and tell you a snow storm is headed to Poughkeepsie. But I happen to be an ethical gypsy. No stone has been left unturned in my quest for information. That's right. I have eavesdropped long and hard to bring you the 2009 news and predictions.

The biggest news of 2009 is that 9 Seekers will have releases this year!

Mary Connealy

Janet Dean

Debby Giusti

Myra Johnson

Glynna Kaye

Julie Lessman

Camy Tang

Missy Tippens

Cheryl Wyatt

There is also news from Unpubbed Island. Within the next 18 months all the Seekers will have left Unpubbed Island. (15 Seekers SOLD!) The island will not be on the real estate market, but will be, as Glynna Kaye hinted Saturday, be turned into a writer's retreat.

Inside news from Tina Russo:

Many of you remember Janet Edgar's Heart & Soul Writer's Retreat; a quarterly cyber retreat that lasted two weeks to a month and provided an opportunity for support while each participant wrote a book in a very short period of time. Janet is no longer with us, but her memory is here forever. We look forward to leaving Unpubbed Island and launching The Seekerville -Janet Edgar, Heart & Soul Writer's Retreat in the very near future.

These next two words will warm the gypsy cockells of your writerly heart:

Mini laptop!
I predict they will be hot, hot, hot in 2009.

Check out the Dell Mini starting at $299.

or the HP Mini starting at $379.
Acer Aspire at $379

ASUS EeePC T91 Touch Screen $299 to $399

And they will fit in my satchel, right next to my crystal ball!!!

I know that many of you are really waiting for my famous Heinz 57 predictions for here they are. Take them with a grain of salt and a bit of steak sauce and you will be fine.

  • Seekers will final in the Golden Heart, RITA and the ACFW Genesis as will several Friends of Seekerville.
  • We will hear rumors of an auction for the sale of a Seeker series in 2009
  • Seekers will top multiple bestseller lists
  • One (or two) Seekers will have a significant weight loss and we shall envy svelte figures
  • In 2009 one of the 15 Seekers will be in involved in a very, very nice book deal as recorded on Publisher's Lunch
  • There is much merriment and rejoicing at a Seeker party in Denver, Colorado during the month of September
  • At least one Seeker will quit a job to devote more time to writing
  • I see chocolate, lots of chocolate..dark, white, milk .....

Oy vey, that's it. I'm exhausted.

Happy New Year to The Seekers and their many friends.

Remember that the views expressed by Madame Zelda are not necessarily those of Seekerville.


Madame Zelda said...

Good morning, kedeves of Seekerville. That is Hungarian for darlings.

I, Madame Zelda, have brought the feast with me. Bagels, lox, Gundel pancakes, and kolbasz (sausage).


Tina M. Russo said...

Welcome to Seekerville, Madame Z. So I am reviewing your predictions and am pretty sure I am the one who will be strutting her girlish new figure. Right?

Madame Zelda said...

Sure. Sure. Shove another sausage in your mouth. I do predictions. Not miracles.

Jessica said...

Hmmm, I guess I should have waited to buy a laptop. Those ones look great and SO cheap!
Thanks for the predictions. I can't wait to read every book written by a Seeker. :-)

Madame Zelda said...

Good morning, Jessica dahlink.

You look thin, have a pancake.

I look forward to reading books written by you. So will you use your real name or perhaps a pseudonym, like Zelda Nelson ?

Cheryl Wyatt said...

May it be so and more!

Julie Lessman said...

Madame Zelda, you are one of my favorite guests in all of Seekerville ... but, ah, you already knew that, didn't you, dahlink?

And, what, no movie deals??? I see Michael Landon Jr. making a movie about a widow with three little girls marrying the twin of her dead husband ... or a pretty spinster bent on adopting an orphan-train child ... or perhaps a medical thriller about a small town and its deadly blood supply ...

The options are endless, my dear, and I am a bit disappointed that your visions is ... shall we say a bit foggy in the movie realm? But your other predictions and your Hungarian pastries ? To die for!

Ruth Logan Herne said...

Madame Z, welcome back! As always, woman, you tell it like it is...

Or like it ought to be.

And maybe, just maybe WILL be!

From your mouth to God's ears.

And this sausage???? Oh mylanta, you Hungarian gypsies have the sausage market sewn up, although I know this little Italian sausagemaker in Greece (Greece, NY, not Greece the island country)who makes sausage to die for, studded with artichokes, asiago and spinach. Oh mylanta, smothered in grilled peppers and onions, I can promise I'm not the svelte Seeker you mention.

But I have my own suspicions on that front.

And Zelda, isn't a womanly figure to be cherished? I've seen those Renaissance paintings. We're talkin' size 16, minimal, and that's AFTER the new American sizes (read... added inches)have taken effect.

And Jessica Simpson looks great, if you ask me. Morons.

And snow in Poughkeepsie. Like duh.

Okay, I digress. Zelda, do you have any thoughts about the economy, making ends meet? Give us your thoughts, your wisdom, dear. Inquiring minds want to know.

And those laptops look great. I envy your far-flung intuition.

MOSTLY... I'm looking forward to the Janet Edgar Seekerville writer's retreat. I went on one cyber trip with Janet, and had the time of my life. In fact, that was when a dear friend of mine became known as a Secret Agent.

Great gal, great time. I have her book on my shelf as a remembrance of a woman unafraid to give back constantly.

Okay, I need something sweet. I made baklava, Madame Z., fresh and warm from the oven.

Help yourselves, ladies and gents.


Audra Harders said...

Love having you here with us, Madame Z!! In times likes this it's great to hear the wonderful visions you have for Seekers!

Dear, dear Janet Edgar, the ultimate hostess. I miss her so much. I started a new Keeper shelf when her book came out.

She worked so hard to keep all the cooks, waiters and maids in line. . .and those cabana boys, ah, er men!! Wonderful getaway. Can't wait to do it again!

Please continue to fill us with your predictions as I make my way to the bagels, lox and cream cheese. Obviously, moi is not the Seeker in svelte, LOL!

Mary Connealy said...

Do hungarian gypsies say OyVey???

Just askin'

Mary Connealy said...

I read your predictions with a glowing heart and came away certain you were right on many counts.

The chocolate for example.

Oh, and be very careful that the magnetic energy in your mini-laptop doesn't distort the power in your crystal ball. You might accidentally pick up messages from the middle east and end up with Homeland Security kicking down your door. Madame Zelda would not LIKE prison in Guantanamo Bay.

Sandra Leesmith said...

Madame Z, love the predictions. I'm claiming a couple like publication and weight loss. (Can it be more than one since Tina claimed it already?)

A cyber vacation. How fun. I heard about the last one and Ruthy tried to talk me into it. I should have gone. I won't miss out again. smile.

I'm munching on fresh blackberries so I can have that weight loss. They are yummy. And I'll share. And no you can't add whipped cream!!

Madame Zelda said...

Oh you Seekers make me laugh, and a good belly laugh is what it is all about.

Julie, dear I am working on the movie deals, however, yes it is fuzzy. My Hollywood connection keeps disappearing.

Yes, Hungarian Jewish gypsies do say OvVey Mary. Watch it girl.

Ruth, enough sausage dear, you must share with the others.

Ruth Logan Herne said...

All right, no more talk of sausage makers and quaint delis.

How about bakeries???? Loaded with tender, flaky pastries.

Wait. Irrelevant.

How about the Super Bowl??? And football food?

Why am I obsessing with food all of a sudden. All this talk of diets.

And how could you not love Kurt Warner's story. Oh my stars, the whole grocery store boy goes big time and wins a Super Bowl and marries the check-out girl.

Fairy tale stuff. Love it.

Okay, back to work.

Grabbing some baklava on the way out.


Mary Connealy said...

I need something special for a Super Bowl Party. It needs to be REALLY special because I don't watch football, so I probably need to be able to eat it steadily for about four hours and keep enjoying it.
It needs to be delicious, easy, macho but still cool.

Any thoughts??

So far I'm pretty much stuck on Little Smokies with barbeque sauce poured over--or doritoes. So you can see there's room to innovate here.

Madame Zelda??? Any predictions about what I'll make?

And I love Baklava but think I might get laughed out of the party. Baklava is soooooooo not macho. I might as well take petit fors, cucumber sandwiches and just stand outside in the snow from the first.

Jessica said...

Madame Zelda,
I am very thin. Except my bootie. I'll gladly eat your delicious treats if you promise they won't go straight to my butt.

LOL Zelda Nelson! I love it!

Ann said...

Baklava! Mini laptops!

Someone is speaking my love language.

Pretty neat about all the Seekervillians making it off the island.

Jessica said...

In fact, give me a stack of pancakes.
I could use some bosoms.

Jessica said...

Eek! I just realized you knew my last name!

You're a sneaky one Madame Zelda.

Ruth Logan Herne said...

Madame Zelda IS sneaky. Good you realize that, Jess.

Hence the fact that no one east of Romania knows her true identity. She's THAT secretive.

Pancakes create a bosom? Wow, if we could market that, think of the plastic surgeons we could put out of business!

Who knew????


My pulled beef recipe is super easy and makes outrageously good Super Bowl beef b-b-q sandwiches. You can make it tomorrow and just heat it up on Sunday.

Or how about chicken wing dip? So good.

Meal or appetizer/muchie thing?

We'll help you. If we're invited.

And hey, don't knock the baklava. I've never been laughed out of a party for bringing something sweet. Besides myself that is. :)

They're men. It's food. Although cucumber sandwiches would get you laughed out into the snow.


Myra Johnson said...

Madame Zelda, you are a riot! So wise! So prophetic! So ... What exactly is that outfit you're wearing? Do they sell those at Macy's?

Mary, I saw the perfect "macho" Super Bowl dish on Good Morning America today. I might have the details slightly skewed, but here's the gist: You braid several strips of bacon to form a base layer, then spread it with some kind of sausage and barbecue sauce, add another layer of bacon, roll it up, coat it with more sauce, and bake it. Then you slice it and all the men go wild (while their cholesterol shoots up to 6,397).

Cathy S. said...

Madame Z,

I enjoyed your predictions.

Can you predict when the snow will loosen its grip on the Midwest?

Are you getting any signals about whether cozy mysteries will make a comeback and/or what's taken their place?

Lastly, what will be the next popular genre, in your opinion--I mean, according to your crystal ball.

For extra credit, you could predict the super bowl winner and/or the next retailer to call it quits, or do your signals only connect with publishing?


Madame Zelda said...

No promises, Jessica.

Myra, you lik? It is a traditional gypsy dress called a svaglajzanow. I have them in assorted colors. Tailor made. You would like a few? My cousin, Hennie the Tailor makes them for me. Pure silk.

Madame Zelda said...

Cathy, what do you think this is the psychic channel? Maybe you want to grease my palm with some gold first, eh?

Jessica said...

Well Madame Zelda,
maybe I should just get pregnant again. That always seems to do the trick.


Mary Connealy said...

Madame Zelda, you crack me up.

I just found out we're having a mini-wild game feed at the party...that's code word for deer sausage....

Better than raccoon I guess.

so, I guess I'd better go for sweets.

but thanks for the braided bacon and sausage recipe. How could that possibly go wrong.

And I'd like the bbq beef recipe, Ruthy.

Mary Connealy said...

Oh, and I heard a prediction that oughta KILL YOU ALL.

Personal computers...will be obsolete in ten years. WHY? Because Google is already testing an online storage source so effective that yes, you'll need a monitor and keyboard, but no more tower, no more memory, no more mgs of ram (or whatever). And we KNOW that's the expensive stuff.
Only internet access and you're set.

Google will do it all for you.

Could that be? Hold off on that laptop purchase, the beta tests may start within a year.

Pam Hillman said...

No, Tina & Sandra, I take dibs on the svelte figure.

Seekerville uninhabited in 18 months? Yippee, skippy! Madame Z, you know my afinity for remembering things, so I'm going to hold you to that prediction!

Pass the pancakes!

Madame Zelda said...

Dah-link, Mary, you are just going to let Google take over the world? I think not.

They also are beta testing wireless crystal balls.

Yes, Pamela. Seekerville turned into a writing retreat and spa. Count on it. 18 months.

Ruth Logan Herne said...

Mare, the BBQ beef is simple. Mind you I should be editing right now, but in the interest of a joyous super bowl meal, here goes:

A couple of big, thick boneless chuck roasts...

Sprinkle liberally with garlic, salt, pepper and onion bits (or chopped onion if you prefer...)

Bake in covered roaster at 350 degrees until meat falls apart with fork. Add water midway if needed. Should take several hours.

Cool meat. If you're a wuss, you shouldn't make this because now you need to pull the meat away from the fat with your hands, like pulled pork.

Hence the verb: 'pulled'.

Once you've separated the meat, add a bottle of your favorite barbecue sauce. We like Famous Dave's rich and sassy, but any one will do.

We serve it on toasted garlic rolls, like mini-garlic breads.

Spread the rolls onto cookie sheets. Butter top and bottom. Sprinkle with garlic and salt. Layer with cheese, if desired. Brown lightly and fill with meat.

Meat can be done ahead of time and reheated in slow cooker.

I think I posted this one not long ago, so if I did post it in Seekerville and you guys think I'm redundant, let me assure you that you're correct.

Just sayin'.


Melanie Dickerson said...

I think you were seeing me when you made the chocolate prediction.

Mary, men always eat chili during the Super Bowl, don't they? I don't know, though. I'm always pouting during the Super Bowl, because it always happens on my birthday weekend. Although no one ever notices. *Pout*

Mary Connealy said...




Madame Zelda said...


Happy Birthday.

Melanie Dickerson said...

Thanks, Mary and Zelda. Y'all are sweet. :-)

Missy Tippens said...

Well, I'll be. A mini laptop?? So cool! I had no idea. Thanks for sharing your crystal ball, Madame Zelda!

I love your predictions. I hope every single one pans out! And I'm staking my claim to be the svelte one. Of course, that would mean giving up chili and pulled pork and baklava and pancakes (the breast-enhancing kind).


By the way, Ruthy, as I took the bottle of Mylanta out of the cabinet at 2:00 this morning, I thought of you! Oh, mylanta!

Tina M. Russo said...

Mel, is your b-day today? My hubs is today.

Happy Birthday TOM!!

Melanie Dickerson said...

No, it's actually the 3rd.

Melanie Dickerson said...

I better go pick up my party dress from the cleaners.

Myra Johnson said...

Melanie, maybe Madame Zelda will let you borrow one of her cool silk svaglajzanows. I'm thinking of putting one on order to wear at ACFW next fall.


Melanie Dickerson said...

Her cool silk what? Madame Zelda already called me a "ruler of Egypt from 1867 to 1914 governing as a viceroy of the sultan of Turkey." I'm learning all kinds of new vocabulary words today.

Tina M. Russo said...

LOL, Mel you are too funny. I really did fall on the floor in hysterics.

Madame Z has a very eclectic vocabulary.

Madame Zelda said...

Yes, Melanie, my little rubklaraii-- party at your house on Tuesday.

Now what shall I wear?

Missy Tippens said...

Happy birthday Melanie and Tom!!


Melanie Dickerson said...

Thanks, Missy. :-)

Okay, Madame Z, I tried to look up that last one, but Google asked me, "Do you mean 'rub Klara'?" And I didn't think that was what you meant. You'll have to translate that bit of gypsy Bohemian into English.

Oh, yes, Happy Birthday to Tom! He's lucky. He probably doesn't mind (almost) sharing his birthday with the SuperBowl. Or at least, I hope Tina doesn't sit glued to the TV and snap at anybody who has the nerve to talk to him while Kurt Warner is rolling to his right.

Melanie Dickerson said...

Oops. Freudian slip. I meant "anyone who has the nerve to talk to HER in the middle of a Kurt Warner pass." Not HIM.

Tina M. Russo said...

I don't do Superbowl unless the Buffalo Bills are in it and we know the correlation to a cold day in hell is better left unsaid.