Monday, March 28, 2011

CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW EXCLUSIVE EXPOSE!!!! "MY LIFE WITH THE SEEKERS"


"Good morning, Seekerville, this is Dresden Davis reporting for R-Witness News, the go-to place for discerning romance lovers everywhere, reporting to you here from the mainland with Captain Jack Sparrow, nefarious pirate of the high seas. Captain Jack has been the subject of film and dissertation across the land, and, yay, across the world. For the past twenty-seven months, Jack has been holed up on a tropical island playing barista and cabana boy to a nefarious group of romance writers who call themselves Seekers. Jack, tell me, what was it like, working for those women? Did they treat you well?"

"Ah, Dresden, m'love, 'tis only you I have eyes for at the present. Let's not speak of others, ay? Drink to me only with thine eyes.... and do ye have a bit o' rum?"

"Not at eight AM, Jack."

"Ah, darlin' lass..." Jack leans a bit closer, close enough for me to note his eyeliner is actually holding better than mine. Clinique, mayhap???? "'Tis five o'clock somewhere. Me friend Jimmy Buffet sung about it, ye know. Why Margaret Daley and I did a little 'flamingo' dance to it just last year." He draws close. Very, very close. "Margaret's got a thing for flamingos. Savvy???"

"Margaret and flamingos." My brain reels, knowing Margaret's an Okie... there are NO flamingos in Oklahoma, which means.... Margaret gets around.

Just as I suspected. I meet Jack's move forward with one of my own, noting his hair beading has a Pandora look to it. Pricey. Nice. Those Seeker women certainly kept him well. "But lets talk today about your experiences on Unpubbed Island. What was it like? Wild and crazy? Dull and boring? Tell us, Jack. Tell ALL..." I let my voice fade, leading Jack to a comfort level, like I'm his new BFF. Although all he'd have to do is give me one of those long, slow looks and I WOULD BE....

Jack meets my look and comes closer, close enough for me to see his mascara is too dark for me but holding up in the morning sun marvelously. "Parties."

"Parties?" I almost croak the words, because this.... OH, THIS!!!! These Seekers are fine Christian women, they're a church-going bunch that loves God, loves their country and loves romance that makes the world go 'round.... PARTIES!!!! BRING ON THE FRONT PAGE, BOSS!!! I lean closer... "What kind of parties?"

Jack's eyes widen. He gives me an appreciative smile and I KNOW instinctively (we reporters have VERY GOOD INSTINCTS, think Deep Throat and Watergate....) that he's about to spill everything and I'll use it to expose the Secret Life of Bees.

Oh, wait, that's been done. I meant:

The Secret Life of Seekers.

YES!!!!! "Tell me about the parties, Jack," I say softly, leading him, another skill I pride myself on. "Tell Dresden every little thing."

"Amazing," he says, then takes a long swig of coffee. I have the Starbucks crew bring him more because I want no interruptions while Jack tells his tale. "At first they were sporadic. Like here and there. Lately..." He shook his head and puffed steam from his brew, a bit of foamed milk clinging to his mustache and making him look even more approachable.

YUM.


Holly Jacobs
"Now, they have 'em all the time. It's like a weekly occurrence that someone or 'nother has a "Gettin' off the Island" party. Gettin' published 'n all. First them. Now their friends. And they have so many friends, men... Women..." His eyes brighten at that thought, rogue that he is. "Holly Jacobs... a fine writer she is, but I hear people throw stuff at her when she speaks in public, so she might want to stick to her keyboard, ye' ken??? And they've got a last 'un of the original fifteen, Pammy, and ah...."

Jack's face gets that dreamy-starry-eyed look we women know so well and I know this must be Pam Hillman, 2011 Golden Heart finalist and a new client of Steve Laube, one of the top-notch agents in Christian fiction. I lean in, hoping for more on Miss Pam. "Tell me about Pam, Jack." I encourage him with a long... slow... blink. "Tell me everything, big guy."


2011 GH finalist Pam Hillman
"I love her," he admitted. "But then I love them all, they've made my life..." he hiccups a little, looking suddenly ver klempt, like he'd just lost his mother to Davy Jones Locker.... "wonderful, is all. Just wonderful. And I can't help but worry me heart out what will happen to me? To the Island? When they're all gone?"

Time to get the bloker back on track. I mean, really????? "Do they all come to the parties, Jack? Tina? Cara? How about RITA FINALIST Mary Connealy?" I'm thinking right now it would be front page worthy to get the scoop on that Petticoat-pushing beef farmer from Nebraska. I mean: AS IF.
Mary's reputed pet chicken, a Golden Sebright
Who believes THAT bio and the rumor she used to have a pet chicken??? Obviously a creation of a clever marketing department, but nothing gets by me, the Dresden-ator. "Who's there, Jack, my pirate-friend? When the lights go down on Unpubbed Island?"

"They bring in their friends," Jack begins again. "Bob Mayer came by and spent a day with 'em and got 'em all feelin' like they're normal with that Warrior Writer stuff. The hissy fits, the desperation, the tears, the neuroses... He called them 'common to writers everywhere...' But he was an okay bloke, you know, one of those military types I'm not usually all that taken with, but Bob...." Jack dips his chin. "He's all right. Savvy?"

Savvy? I LOVE Bob Mayer, and Jack's actually met the dude???? SWEET. "Tell me more. Tell me about the women, Jack."

Karen White and Ruthy
"Karen White," he says instantly. "A four-time Rita finalist. Gorgeous. All that hair..." Jack gets a dreamy look in his eye. "A friend of mine bid 200 camels for her long ago, a ridiculously high price I thought. And then I met her here, in Seekerville..." Jack shoots me a look. "I'd have gone 300 CAMELS for a prize like that. Mayhap I can offer the judges some camels, fresh imports? That might put her just over the top enough to win this year! And Edwina, my love, with that wizened look of knowledge, like she holds the key to every mystery..." He sends me a slightly wicked glance. "Edwina is more than she seems."

"Really?" Since I know Edwina Cowgill through her marvelous book reviews, I edge closer. "You and Edwina..."

Edwina Cowgil
"Talked books all night long," he told me in a soft voice that dripped with mystery. "She showed me her collection of jewels. Did you know she has bracelets, necklaces, earrings and rings to match everything she owns? And hangs them together in the closet?"

"Umm... no." Who knows that kind of stuff about someone? I mean I KNOW Edwina is always decked out, but matchy-matchy everything????

"She's amazing." He whispered the words as if saying them out loud might taint the memory. Really??? Are ya' kiddin' me? This is Jack Sparrow, whispering in THAT TONE about a book discussion. Obviously Edwina is one of those still waters....

I sit back, hungering for more, or maybe eyeing one of those lemon pound cake slices, so good, delectable really, melt-in-your-mouth wonderfulness.

"Tell me about Julie, Jack." I lean in, trying not to stare at the pound cake, thinking 'SIZE 8, SIZE 8, SIZE... MAYBE 10..."

"Julie is one of a kind."

Aha. "As in...?"

"Beautiful, voluptuous, darling, sincere, and did you know she can PIPE INITIALS on twice-baked potatoes?"

I throw up, just a little, in my mouth.

"And Camy?" I press, thinking the loud Asian chick might be the chink in Jack's armor. Two years is a long time for a man of Jack's reputation to remain.... lonely.

"A child," he scoffs. "More Will's type than mine. But then there was Marilyn Brant."

I loved her book "According to Jane", a fun twist on non-Austen-esque modern behaviors. Brilliant switch-around. "You and Marilyn...."

"Spent a never-to-be-forgotten evening discussing everything Austen. Jane's an old friend o' mine, savvy?"

I'm not surprised. Anyone who can woo Mr. Darcy would have an easy time with Jack. "Deb Giusti," I press.

Jack's expression deepens. Softens. "A true American, that one. For such, just wars are fought. If I were a soldier, and let me just add I would never BE a soldier, I'd fight for the likes of Deb Giusti... And me-thinks she spoke of a tiara in her past... A crown of some sort.... Perhaps a pageant past in an army-brat's life???" He meets my gaze. "The idea of Deb in a tiara puts me in mind of..." He swallows hard, a woebegone, love-lost expression giving him that half-asleep look we all know and love.

Deb Giusti's Miss Mount Vernon Tiara
Except now is NOT TIME FOR SLEEPING.

"More coffee!" I hail the barista. "And how about two slices of that lemon pound cake."

"Every now and then, when I'm missing the Black Pearl, missing adventures, the lasses will bring Walt and Vince around." Jack sits back and nods, flirts with a Wall-Street chick wearing a Rockette-type suit with SEAMED STOCKINGS, and I notice she doesn't order pound cake or extra whipped cream and I realize I might hate her without even knowing her. The wrongness of that doesn't bother me all that much at the moment. I will repent at leisure later because the barista is bringing pound cake my way...

"Vince does great reviews, but do you think he's got a thing for Ruthy?" I ask quietly. Keeping Jack directed is not an easy task, but I'd love to get something on that Ruthy-character. Bossy. Autocratic. Flippant... the fact that she's got good hair DOES NOT preclude me wanting to find a fatal flaw in her character. Although her new pics are a work of art and she'd probably resist that lemon cake, if not the M&M peanuts she brags on all the time.

"Myra, actually," he says instantly. "And Vince is another military bloke, a pilot, ye ken?"

"Really?" I didn't know that.

Walt Mussell
"Been to thirty countries, but that's nothin' compared to me and the Pearl," Jack boasts. "But he's a thinkin' man, he loves the ladies and their words, but his wife's a fine bit of a thing and she keeps him tethered well. And Walt, well, Walt has an appreciation for the East and since my travels have taken me far and wide, we discuss things at length."

"Over rum?"

"Over whatever the ladies have on hand." Jack laughs but nods. "And they keep me a bit o' rum, now and again. For medicinal purposes. And holidays. And the good Lord himself was a wine-drinker, I'm thinkin' a spot o' rum now and again to avoid the lumbago keeps a man's heart pumpin' and his interest brewin'. No pun intended." He sends me that wicked grin once more and I realize I'm getting nothing from Jack.

And then I realize something else. The bloke LOVES THE SEEKERS.


Even though they keep him somewhat sequestered, even though his days are long, hot and sunny, even though they've emptied fourteen of fifteen huts....

He loves 'em.

He's ruining my expose!!!

(sorry, a Phineas and Ferb moment there, speaking of which..._)

"Jack, do you have TV on the island?"

"My one love in life is to watch "Phineas and Ferb" with Pepper and Ruthy," he admits. "When we're not reading Barbara Vey's blog for Publisher's Weekly, of course. Barbara was nice enough to have me as an honored guest at her recent birthday bash.... But back to Pepper and Ruthy... We roll around in the sand..."

Oh... Oh.... Oh......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Laughing," he continues. "That Candace. I've met many a Candace in my day. But I love those lads..."I know what we're going to do today, Ferb," Jack deadpans a perfect imitation of Phineas. "I love the show but Pepper Basham...." he smiles and winks...."that lady not only has a way with words but have you seen her new picture with that cascade of curls???"

Obviously Jack has a hair thing going on. Not surprising, considering his own unique 'do'.

"Janet Dean's got the cutest little crooked toes," he continues. "They're actually quite effective for digging in the sand, no hands. A marvelous feat." He shares one of those cock-eyed grins. "A pun, dear, get it? My play on words. Feet. Feat. And did you know that another quirk of fate had Andrea Chermak born on All Saint's Day?"

"The author of Fearless?" I ask.

Jack nods.

"Will wonders never cease," I mutter, feeling like I might have wasted not only my time but the last twelve dollars on the twenty-dollar Starbucks card my mother sent for my birthday. Gone... Just like that. Two coffees and two pound cakes, both of which I ate.

Sigh....

"But then there's TINA..." he says, and my hope spirals up again. "I'd do anything for her. Ford a raging river... Sail the seven seas.... Climb a tree in search of the best coconuts known to man."

"Tina Radcliffe, author of "The Rancher's Reunion" and "Oklahoma Reunion"??? THAT TINA RADCLIFFE???"

Oh, I'm on to something now, because she's even bossier than Ruthy, and almost as smart as Mary... Tina and Jack... YES. PERFECTAMENTE! Scandal and front page, hand in hand.

Jack hands me a slip of paper. Trembling, just a little, I open it, sure that it's the key to some secret Seeker scandal, that one of them, AT LEAST is leading some sort of tell-all double-life expose:


Tina's Coconut Cake

1 box yellow cake mix
1 can sweetened condensed milk
1 can cream of coconut (in mixed drink aisle-if you use the kind in the plastic bottle only use 3/4)
12 oz Cool Whip ( I sometimes use more)
1 -2 cups flaked coconut (I like as much as I can get on there)


Bake cake according to directions in a 9 x 11 ish glass pan.

Immediately after removing from oven, punch holes all over the top with a fork. LOTS OF HOLES. Pouring slowly over the cake, while hot, alternate sweetened condensed milk and cream of coconut. Let stand thirty minutes then refrigerate overnight. MUST BE OVERNIGHT!!

Before serving top with cool whip and sprinkle coconut on top
And so it goes...


Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. And as I sat there conversing with Jack, I decided that I, too, will become a friend of Seekerville.


Because I really like these gals. And because I do, there's a lovely surprise Seeker-package going out to one commenter today. And maybe a couple of books to other commenters, because seeing Jack's love for the Seekers makes me feel sweet. Magnanimous. Generous to a fault.


And that's never a BAD thing, right?


This is Dresden Davis, reporting for "R-Witness" News.

135 comments :

  1. 14 of 15 now???

    Time for Friends of Seekers to raid the Island... Hopefully Debby left more of the oatmeal cookies in the zip lock.

    This was TOO MUCH FUN. Thanks for sharing Cap'n Jack! More rum pleeeezzzeee!!! :)

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  2. I think you found a scandal, Dresden. Surely piping initials on twice baked potatoes is illegal in most states. I mean...if it's not...it OUGHTA BE.

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  3. Oh my goodness!!! What a fun-tabulous interview! ;D

    OK, can Jack come and visit my blogoversary party this week on my blog? Pretty please with sugar on top? He could be the barista!

    And don't worry, Jack--there are still a few of us friends of Seekers left on unpubbed island...at least for now, anyway! ;)

    ~Amber

    stokes[dot]a[at]suddenlink[dot]net

    P.S. The blogoversary party starts today on my blog:

    http://wwww.seasonsofhumility.blogspot.com

    And Julie Lessman will be the special guest on Wednesday!

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  5. You had me laughing the whole way through! Savvy?

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  6. FUN!

    I wonder if Jack knows any Backyardigans Pirates - like Pirate Redboots. Cuz dems the only pirates we been watchin' 'round here lately...

    I've got breakfast. Mostly pastries. And bacon. And eggs.

    Drawing?

    Where?

    carol at carolmoncado dot com

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  7. Yeah - I dunno what kind of accent that's supposed to be...

    =D

    It was in my head. Trying to figure out how Scrivener works has me all messed up.

    Plus it's snowing...

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  8. HAHAHAHA! Ok, that was pretty funny, pretty pithy, pretty snarky- until Vince showed up! And then Walt! And then Pepper! Hahaha! Oh, that was great...
    Virginia
    P.S. I've never gotten the Jack Sparrow thing. I like his name, but he's sooo.... Ew. And he's EVERYWHERE.

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  9. 'Tis dreadful lonely I am, K.C., savvy? Wind, sun, rain, surf... but the company of a sweet lass like yourself would be a wonderful thing.

    And bring your little friend. She swims, right?

    Aye, Mary, me-lass, I was thinkin' much the same thing! If y've time to pipe initials, y've more time for other... things.

    Cards, mayhap? Or knitting.

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  10. Amber, sweet lass, I'd love t' come and visit wi' your sweet ladies!

    And the gents as well, of course, although the military types are a bit straight-laced for me. They see rules as rules.

    Whereas I see 'guidelines'....

    And treasure. I'm always in the market for a good treasure hunt, ye ken?

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  11. Carla and Carol, ah, lovely lasses, laughter is indeed the best medicine.

    Before me sweet mum passed into God's heavenly kingdom (ye all understand a well-lived pirate counts on the Lord's blessings, don' ye?

    And his forgiveness, of course!)she'd send me the latest Reader's Digest magazines. I'd find them in each port...

    And spent my days at sea reading Laughter is the Best Medicine. Now, ye dinna know such about me, did ye?

    And FYI: I've sailed with the Backyardigans many a time, and have played in that very back yard. Uniqua.... Tyrone.... Pablo...Tasha... They're fine mates!

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  12. Virginia, sweet thing....

    I am at a loss myself, and yet my popularity grows instead of wanes...

    Which means a paycheck, savvy?

    Women falling at my feet wherever I go....

    And a great PR department.

    But of course m' greatest honor is being holed up on Unpubbed Island, watching m' friends success grow in leaps and bounds.

    Although Dresden did seem to have her own agenda during that interview, didn't she? I might have to invite her to vacation on the Island. Meet the ladies.

    She'll never forget my coffee-making skills.

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  13. Ahhh, Jack me love, you're giving away all me secrets! But for another pretty trinket - you're forgiven.

    And yes, count me as a friend of Seekerville, hangin' out on the island.

    edwina(dot)cowgill(at)yahoo(dot)com

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  14. Dear Jack,

    Telling my secrets??? I mean, it was my first keynote and that water bottle (which was thankfully closed) was accidentally whacked in my direction, and I maintain that it helped the talk go off with a bang...somewhat literally! LOL

    Ah, but I'll forgive you for telling, because Jack, how can a woman not forgive you just about anything?? LOL

    You did a wonderful interview!

    Holly

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  15. Oh my stars, JACK!!!!

    DIDN'T WE TELL YOU: NO INTERVIEWS????

    What will people think?

    Normal people, that is????

    Gadzooks, man, you've sunk us!

    But the coconut cake is to-die-for and I do believe Dresden might have done us all a favor.

    Note the word: MIGHT.

    It remains to be seen.

    HOLLY JACOBS!!! Oh my gosh, girlfriend, thanks for stopping by Seekerville!!!! And let me just add I cannot wait to get my hands on your latest book Homecoming Day...

    It's winging its way to me from Amazon.com right now!!! "Count on a Cop" series....

    Oh, yum! Gotta love a man in uniform!

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  16. Edwina, you quiet thing, you!

    I'm quite impressed. But not a bit surprised, LOL!

    You rock, woman, and I'm going to take a hint from your classy look and organization that the whole thing totally works. Good for you!

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  17. Starting a Monday with Captain Jack, can the day get any better?

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  18. How do you people deal with this guy ALL THE TIME????

    Although his eyeliner is PERFECT.

    Is there coffee???

    Please tell me there's coffee and spring is coming. I'm from Chicago now and lower Wisconsin originally and I'm just dying for spring.

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  19. Loves 2 Read Romance - LauraMarch 28, 2011 at 8:31 AM

    Hi everyone! Thanks for sharing with us Jack! How have you been? I haven't seen you since Barbara Vey's Bash a few weeks back. Would love to win email below!


    fantum2004ATsbcglobalDOTnet

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  20. Captain Jack, if not for you, my crooked toes would've grown weary from digging in the island sand and my sandcastle would never have won the Best of Show trophy. Your mid-day foot massages--ah, you have marvelous hands, as well as great mascara--saved the day!

    Janet

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  21. It's so nice to see Captain Jack here this morning! He was a big hit at the PW Beyond Her Book party. People are still talking about him and I've heard that locks of his hair are being sold on eBay.

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  22. Mornin' Jack, Are you setting up the beach limbo game today? And how about the roasted pig? Is it in the pit?

    Ruthy thinks you love her best. Hmmmmm. We know some secrets though don't we?

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  23. Ruth, Thanks so much about Homecoming Day! Good luck getting Jack to behave... LOL

    Holly

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  24. I make that coconut cake a lot and take it to church suppers. It is really great! I just finished reading Tina's book, The Ranchers Reunion and it was great. Five stars all the way. Loved it. Read it in one day because I couldn't wait to see how it ended.

    plhouston(at)bellsouth(dot)net

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  25. (You'd think with all that rum, he would have forgotten a few things by now.
    hmmm.)

    Good morning Jack. I've been craving coconut cake (it's an Easter thing) so thanks for sharing Tina's recipe.
    Or should I thank Dresden?
    Happy Sunny Monday!!

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  26. Hi Ruthy and Captain Jack! Great blog.

    That coconut recipe makes my mouth water. I'm going to make it soon. Thanks Tina!!!

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  27. It's a good thing Seekervillians come back to the island for the parties - it sounds like Jack would be getting a bit lonely otherwise!

    Big congrats again to Pam and Mary!

    Oh, and Jack? I'll have a nice foamy hot chocolate this morning - Carol M. and I have snow on our side of the island....

    Enter me in the drawing, please!
    jandrex(at)juno(dot)com

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  28. What fun...thanks for reporting :) I love Capt'n Jack's perspectives!

    Lorna

    lornafaith at gmail dot com

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  29. Expose?????

    I had to face my boss with THIS....

    And play nicey-nice with a scalawag pirate whose mascara is better quality than mine.

    This is not a good day.

    BUT....

    Rubbing elbows with publishing insiders like BARBARA VEY whose job is my DREAM JOB IN PUBLISHING??????

    This Midwesterner is loving life!

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  30. hi everyone! I'm hungry now thanks to all the food talk!

    Susanna

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  31. What FUN!!!! LOVED this delightful and silly post.

    PLEEZ enter me!
    joanne(at)joannesher(dot)com

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  32. Laura, I remember you well, darling, from Barbara's bash....

    The Fica tree incident?

    Didja bring rum, per chance, me darlin'? This coffee's in need of flavor.

    And I'm not talking coffee-shop flavor. Savvy?

    Cara-mia.... That sweet face... do remember the night of your first sale? When you and I danced the night away, beneath the stars? Until your husband claimed you as his own.

    Did not ONE OF YOU LADIES consider my fate when you all came to the Island?

    One man.

    Bruno does not count.

    And an Island full of mostly married women.

    And a drab of rum!

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  33. The eyeliner tips alone have kept Jack very popular on Unpubbed Island. We can all learn so much from him.

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  34. Aye, Patsy, I'll be passin' your praise on to miss Tina....

    Lying abed no doubt. Monday morning....

    Not much to do.

    A life of ease amidst the Rockies.

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  35. Aye, Barbara! 'Twas a fine time I had at your party, lass... It is rare to find such an amazing array of food, drink and women in modern society...

    Of course it was nothing compared to Far East ports of call that shall go un-named, but still....

    And no pomp or circumstance because I don't hold well with either...

    Did I mention the drink? The vast array? Publishers Weekly is a fine, fine place of employment, m'dear.

    And you.... a most gracious hostess to a rake such as I...

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  36. Rose wondered....

    "Could a day get any better?"

    Ah, darling.

    It could.....

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  37. Dresden, dear one, perhaps if you were to shop Estee Lauder instead of the dollar store?

    And Clinique does make a fine eye-liner, although I'm partial to their skin care line.

    So refreshing.

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  38. Janet, those toes....

    I think of them as 'little diggers...

    Fondly.

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  39. Great way to start a Monday! Always fun to spend a day with Jack and the Seekers.

    But why is the rum burning?! :o)

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  40. Andrea/Mia/M'darlin...

    I hunted the world wide for your photo lass, to prove to Dresden that you were real, nay, that WE were real....

    Empty pockets, but a full heart.

    Prayin' for ye', heart and soul, lass.

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  41. Positive Thoughts, I've never been thought of as much of a leader so I'd be honored to follow....

    But I'd love to know more, mystery woman....

    Or....

    Whomever.

    Learning my way around the Horn of Africa was far easier than the Internet....

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  42. Jan, here's your hot chocolate, darlin', with extra foam...

    And how nice that you and your playmate work through the snow...

    Do you snow-shoe to see each other? Dog sled? SUV???

    Whipped cream, darling?

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  43. Sandra, me love, do na' tell of our times together!

    You and I....

    Hiking....

    Biking.......

    Talking of this.... And that.

    It's been too long between visits, lass!

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  44. Deb Marvin, ma petite! Curls of gold, flaxen, fallen....

    I've missed ye', Lass!

    Oh, wait, I believe I just said that to Sandra as well...

    'Tis true enough, I miss you all!!!

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  45. Lorna and Joanne, dearhearts, dear souls, I can't imagine what Dresden thought to get on me...

    Or on my beloved friends....

    Why some of these gals sing IN THE CHOIR....

    Choir members never mis-step I've been told.

    I wonder if this is, in fact, true?

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  46. Okay, Jack, you had me at Janet digging in the sand with her crooked toes!! Oh, my. I needed a spew alert. It's too early to be blasting my coffee across my screen.

    :)

    Now, Janet, honey, I hope you'll forgive Jack for dishing on you and your, um, fEAt. :) :)

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  47. Patsy, you rock. Read my book and make the cake. It will now be the Patsy & Tina cake.

    Don't you just love it!! The cake I mean.

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  48. Jack, I know it's five o'clock somewhere but Cheerios and rum is a bit over the top. Even for you.

    Let's try some nice eggs, maple bacon and biscuits.

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  49. Tina, m'love, I'm up for anything you might suggest.

    Savvy?

    And Missy, darlin', don't think I've forgotten those long looks... The fleeting touch of hands... The treasured moments we shared....

    With your whole family.

    And fine children they are, Lass. Although I'm a NC fan m'self.

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  50. Thanks, Dresden, for an entertaining and enlightening interview. With Jack. Wow! What a way to start the day. =)

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  51. Okay - Got a SAND burn I was laughing so hard!
    Seriously.
    Jack, you are a sweetie! I'll roll in the sand with you anyday (wink) - while watching Phineas and Ferb. Especially since Ruthy (sniff, sniff) has set sail.

    No worries Jack - I'll be around for a while. At the pace I'm writing, inchworms will get published faster. LOL

    In the meantime, you can help me perfect my eyeliner use and hairstyling skills :-) OH, btw, could you teach my boys how to swordfight. They already have the swords, they just need a teacher.

    So...back to Ruthy.
    Did you inspire any of her books? Seriously. Deep down does she really want to write a pirate story, or are you the inspiration for all her heroes? ;-)

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  52. And might I say I breathed a sigh of relief that Jack didn't tell any of MY secrets!! :)

    Speaking of margaret Daley... I'm on her blog this week. Stop by for a chance to win a copy of my new release--A Family for Faith!

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  53. JACK!!

    Your ship is in port and do you call me? No. Do you send me spices and silks from your trip to the South Seas? No.

    There will be no kuchen in my kitchen for you, you..you..PIRATE!!!

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  54. Oh, no, Jack! You can't ruin my image of you by being a UNC fan!! Come on, tell me you're a Blue Devil at heart...

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  55. Darlings, please turn to the front of Jack's book and note in the acknowledgments.

    "She made me the man I am today. My agent, Marlena Fortune."

    Enough said.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Oh, wait. You don't know about the BOOK do you?

    And now I've let the rum out of the bag.


    That young girl with the knees, yes, Dresden, has ghostwritten it.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Ah!

    I'm disappointed.

    I was expecting a REAL expose and I got a puff piece instead.

    Pout.

    Ah well. Maybe that's a good thing. Must be because you're all so dang sweet!

    Even Ruthy.

    Hey she visited my BLOG, she's gotta be. ;-)

    Count me a friend of Seekerville and if I can someday catch a GLIMPSE of a real live Seeker I will consider myself blessed. :)

    I can see the cameras and flashing lights now...

    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  58. Casey. uh, yeah. Me, too. I came into this KNOWING the front page could be mine!!!

    "Island-bound Pirate Tells All"

    "Sand, Surf, and Seekers: The One Man They Shouldn't Have Trusted"

    "Tropical Tan, Tropical Oil, Tropical TEASES??? A New Look at the Inhabitants of Seekerville's Unpubbed Island"

    Picture my Perry White-type boss and ENVISION what he thought of this...

    Coffee, Jack. It's the least you can do.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Having Captain Jack visit reminded me of a quote I once heard from Keira Knightly.

    Talking about The Pirates of the Caribbean.

    She said, "It wasn't that fun realizing that when I played a scene with Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom, they were BOTH prettier than me."

    ReplyDelete
  60. Marlena, m'love, first...

    And last....

    Always.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Dresden failed in her expose quest. She will NEVER work in this town again.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Unless, of course, 'tis you within hearin' distance, m'darlin' Madame Z....

    Kuchen?

    Cheese or Berry?

    Don't toy with me, woman!

    ReplyDelete
  63. Pepper, 'tis you of course I think of most often...

    (Do you ALL see these at the same time??? )

    And I don't know if I'm tortured enough for Ruthy to use me as a hero, but I'd like to hope that someday, ONE DAY, I may rise to that occasion...

    Although someone said I'm a dead ringer for Audra's cowboy "Gabe"...

    If I cut my hair.

    And lose the eye make-up.

    But I find its eerie essence keeps some at bay...

    While drawing others.

    Savvy?

    ReplyDelete
  64. Fun today on Seekerville....great for a rainy Monday (3rd day of rain in GA). Please enter me in the drawing!

    ReplyDelete
  65. Ah, Mary-lass, 'tis good t'see ye on this side of the sun, m'darlin'!

    And might I just add I've never been in that part of a barn before.

    Precious.

    And Dresden, poor lass, has no need for big city employment. I envision a fine career with her, here on the Island...

    She can be chief publisher, creator, head of marketing and distribution of "Island Herald"...

    'Tis a fairly new venture, I admit, but with Seekerville's growth, surely 'til needed...

    With a spot o' rum.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Jack...

    Are you offering me a job?

    A job in Seekerville?

    On THE ISLAND????

    I...! I...!.....

    Um....

    Wait....

    Is this like.... for real?

    Because I'm quite psyched, actually.

    Or psyched-out, whatever.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Jack, Jack, Jack! Soon you'll be off to promote your new movie coming out (May, I believe, according to my son - a very big FAN). What will Pam do then??

    Guess us Seekerville friends will have to keep her company. I'm up for an island vacation. Are there cabana boys to serve our every whim? Not partial to rum (more for you, Jack) but I do love a nice Marguerita!

    Thanks for the fun, Captain Jack. Give those pesky reporters a run for their money!

    Cheers,
    Sue
    sbmason at sympatico dot ca

    ReplyDelete
  68. I love it here in Seekerville! It gets better every day.

    ReplyDelete
  69. We're going to have to vote on this whole Dresden come live with me on the island thing Jack.

    What's in it for us.

    I mean you can only have 15 cooks in the kitchen you know and this chick is kind of ..YOUNG.

    If she can ugly down and does windows we might vote in her favor at the next High Council.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Oh, DRESDEN, I WANT MORE ... MORE OF JACK AND MORE DIRT ... UH, OR SAND, I GUESS. MAYBE YOU CAN HAVE JANET DIG IT UP WITH HER PRETTY, LITTLE CROOKED TOES ...

    Thank you, Jack, for saying "Julie is one of a kind." And the saints be praised because God knows my husband couldn't handle any more than one of me. But "beautiful, voluptuous"??? I'm truly humbled ... also a little worried that the eyeliner has hurt your eyes, which are WAY too gorgeous to hide behind a pair of specs, no matter the need.

    Captain Jack FOREVER!!! And, YES, you and Orlando ARE way prettier than Keira ...

    Hugs,
    Julie

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  71. MARY AND RUTHY ... for your information, there is nothing in Missouri statutes forbidding piping initials into twice-baked potatoes. Whipped cream, maybe, but NOT potatoes ...

    Hugs,
    Julie

    ReplyDelete
  72. ROFLOL! Oh, that tops it! Scandal city, love it!

    ReplyDelete
  73. I think Keira's prettier than both Will and Jack...

    But we're both blondes so that might have tipped the scales.

    And really, who do I see about a job here? I'd love to work for you guys. The weather is fab-o, the work is yawn-o, and that leaves me more time on the beach....

    Do I talk to Tina? That's kind of scary, you know.

    ReplyDelete
  74. Ah, Susan... Canada.

    Cold nights.

    Long, cold nights.

    I love Northern girls.

    ReplyDelete
  75. Tina, she's young...

    But just a tad younger than our Camy.

    And we could use a bit of help on the Island, but I wasn't thinking in the kitchen.

    Exactly.

    More like: tour planning. Finding the best spots to take our guests. The busier we are, the more important amenities are, dear.

    You won't mention this to Madame Z., will you?

    Or Marlena.

    Or Edwina, actually.

    Ruthy already knows, but she's a forgiving sort.

    Don't tell Julie.

    Or Pam. Pam's sweet beyond words.

    Or Missy.

    Or....

    We could just call her my niece. Savvy?

    ReplyDelete
  76. Ah, Jules, mon petite, mi amour, m'darlin' lass ....

    The only Seeker who can tire me out. On the beach volleyball court, that is.

    When you're good, you're good.

    And Julie is exceptional.

    ReplyDelete
  77. Katy, lass...

    Tipping my hat your way.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Christy, believe none of it, Lass!

    I'm yours.

    Only.

    Truly.

    Today.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Cheeky man! You must be related to Dave Ebright's Captain Calico Jack Rackham! A delicious interview, thanks. But there's altogether too much discussion of rum for this early in the day. I'm heading for my orange juice. :)

    ReplyDelete
  80. Loves 2 Read Romance - LauraMarch 28, 2011 at 1:32 PM

    Of course I have some rum for you Jack. How else could we get through the day especially with tax season almost over. Also just an FYI Jack I'm not married ;)

    ReplyDelete
  81. Here's a fresh pot of coffee since I've been off the job.

    Captain Jack:

    Can't tell you how glad I am to be here!!

    Got up Saturday morning to rain--and no internet. About 10:30 there was a loud crack of lightning--and cable was gone.

    Spent the entire weekend with no internet or television. Can you imagine life without those necessities?

    Just got service back a little while ago and had to catch up on reading posts.

    I live on a raft anchored out from Seekerville island, but I sneak in at night sometimes and raid the goodies.

    Helen

    ReplyDelete
  82. Ah, loves to read romance...

    Mayhap time to experience the real thing, Laura, darling????

    And Helen, you and I have enjoyed many a night together. Talking of 'shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings...'

    And for a tea-drinker, Lass, y' make a mean pot o' Joe!

    ReplyDelete
  83. Carol, darlin', I agree. 'Tis far too early or perchance it's far too late.

    In any case, I see some Rum-n-butter muffins there that look like fine fare.

    Unless Dresden wolfs them down. She inhaled two pieces of rich, delectable lemon cake at that fancy coffee shop she took me to.

    And no money exchanged hands. Which means she was OWED something by the owner....

    And that means something's not quite right about our Dresden-girl.

    All the more reason to keep her, Tina!

    ReplyDelete
  84. So Helen, dear one, I take it the loss of certain powers of communication meant other powers ...

    Say the power to write great tomes, for instance...

    Were enhanced?

    Savvy?

    ReplyDelete
  85. And by the way, that was a SPECTACULR CHICKEN!!!!!
    I had a TROPHY!!!!!!!!!!

    It was a golden angel with her arms raised, holding.....I can't remember but it definitely wasn't holding a chicken.

    I cherished that trophy until one of my little brothers unscrewed the angel from the wooden base and used her as a 'man' in some toy soldier debacle.
    I reassembled her but ... sigh.... she was never the same. :(

    I'm sorry, I can't talk about it anymore. It's to sad.

    p.s. we did NOT eat that chicken. Or at least, I don't remember doing it. I got busy when I reached my teenage years and I suppose if my mom prepared him discreetly I might have missed it.

    ReplyDelete
  86. Mary, lass, what a touching story.

    It was a 'banty', dear one.

    Scarce three bites. I've seen Rock Cornish Hens (Ah, Molly... A fine farmer's lass 'n all...)with more to eat on than a Banty...

    But the angel statue, now that's warmin' the cockles of me heart.

    ReplyDelete
  87. Actually, barista, the revision powers did get enhanced.

    I dug up one of those dead-end mss that are buried in the back yard and worked on it over the weekend.

    Because an agent told me to.

    Helen

    ReplyDelete
  88. Ah, Helen, an' that's what separates the women from the girls.

    The ability to do what needs to be done. In the dark. With no Internet.

    I'm proud o' ye.

    ReplyDelete
  89. Not JUST a banty, Captain Jack, an OLD banty. Nothing tastier than an elderly rooster.

    ReplyDelete
  90. YAY HELEN!!! Talking with an agent, reworking an existing book with all your growing skills. Good for you, girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  91. Hi Jack!

    Do you think Homeland Security is going to think this post is in code? (How close is “Hi Jack” to “hijack”?)

    Jack and Orlando may be prettier than Keira but who can do the best Elizabeth Bennet? Keira is without peera.

    I was wondering if Dresden has a brother named Homburg. Was Dresden named after the city or the china?

    Offer: If you’d provide me with the coordinates, I’d be happy to land on the beach and give everyone a view of the island from 3,000 feet. (Just one at a time.)

    What would Jack
    think of that?
    Three thousand feet
    is pretty high
    for an 18th Century
    type of guy.


    About Ruthy – I must confess that when I saw my first Ruthy post, more than two years ago, the typography was so original, it was love at first sight!

    Oh, and don’t bother trying to get something on Ruthy – she’s the original “Teflon Mom”.

    I’m actually working on a future Seeker post right now but I’ll be checking back.

    And, Jack, thanks for the mention. I’m really enjoying all the fun.

    Vince

    ReplyDelete
  92. Sigh. What a great post, Jack. I am surprised you were able to get over the bracket craziness of this past week to visit with everyone. Missy knows what I am talking about!

    I have taken everything you say with a grain of salt but in the future I will take it with Tina's coconut cake.

    Peace, Julie

    ReplyDelete
  93. Oh, Good Godiva, you are *hilarious*!!!! LOL. What fabulous imaginings! What delightful humor! What good use of eyeliner!

    (And, btw, I love you, Jack... Our long night discussing Jane will live forever in my memory. Let's talk about her again soon. Over coconut cake this time. ;)
    xoxox

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  94. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  95. Old roosters????

    Tasty? REALLY???

    What is the matter with you people? Who on earth knows these things???

    And yet...

    I'm LOVING this.

    Do I have to wait to be old and gray like the rest of you guys to work here? REALLY????

    ReplyDelete
  96. Umm...

    Wait. That didn't come out right.

    Time to hide under a rock.

    ReplyDelete
  97. Ah, Mary, m'love, 'tis as I said:

    I like me women with a touch of timeliness. Experience as it were. At least in the kitchen.

    Although the barn does nicely too.

    And Marilyn, SWEET LOVE!!!!

    You, me, Jane Austen.

    A night to cherish, mon ami!

    And you look wonderful, darling. Just wonderful!

    ReplyDelete
  98. Julie, m'love, you....

    Me....

    Coconut cake.

    Rum.

    Tropical paradise darling.

    And the only March madness of which I speak is the one without my ladies of Seekerville.

    Be still my heart to have you gone.

    ReplyDelete
  99. Vince, about time you showed your face here, man! I've been bandied about by women all day!

    And your poet's heart becomes you, man! I daresay we could have an evening full of recitation...

    And perhaps a dram or two of rum.

    And cake.

    Aye, and that Ruthy... I know not of Teflon, but I know a wizened woman when I see one, and that one....

    Oh, she's to be watched and reckoned with for sure!

    I generally leave that to Tina while I repose with cake. Tina has a way with her.

    ReplyDelete
  100. Jack, you scoundrel, you ... I don't even PLAY volleyball, so you must be thinking of someone else. Ruthy, perhaps? That woman can block, bump and beach dig with the best of them, and her spike ball will rattle your earrings.

    Just sayin' ...

    ReplyDelete
  101. All I can say is HILARIOUS and I'm a Jill that has never met a Jack. My mouth is watering for a piece of the coconut cake. It looks delicious!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  102. Uh, thanks Jack for sharing.

    That was so funny!

    ReplyDelete
  103. So behind today boy that cake looks really rich have to say I dont like coconut.
    fun post today.

    ReplyDelete
  104. I love hearing about Jack's adventures. I must say he's a great dancer.

    ReplyDelete
  105. Love this post! It made me laugh at the end of a loooong day. Thanks for that, Jack!

    ReplyDelete
  106. KC, I'm here late, but yes, the oatmeal cookies are still in the corner of my once-upon-a-time hut. Dig deep and you'll find them.

    Perhaps May can do the digging.

    ReplyDelete
  107. Jack! You're looking a bit tired. Long day?

    Too much rum?

    The night is young, me lad! And more ladies will be stopping by to say hello. Surely, you'll be ready to greet them with a wink and a hug.

    ReplyDelete
  108. They're okay old.

    Roosters.

    Not pirates so much.

    If they're stewed. With dumplings.

    You must trust me, Dresden.

    ReplyDelete
  109. Julie, do not fault the memory of a pirate who played opposite you. Trust me. If it had been Ruthy, I'd have remembered because she doesn't stop talking long enough to bump the ball.

    But it WAS rather late in the day... And there had been some partying going on. Sandra's first sale party, mayhap???

    And Jillian, lass, you can be Jill to my Jack any time.... And I'll consider myself blessed. As for going up hills???? Depends what's at the top.

    Savvy?

    Faye, m'lassie, 'tis fine to see you! Havin' ye about, brings down the median age of Seekerville to almost sixty.

    But I like me women like I like fine cheese. Aged and with a little bite.

    Savvy?

    ReplyDelete
  110. Ah, Margaret... I knew you'd remember. That was a night, wasn't it, dearheart?

    And Renee Ann, we pirates like a bit o' laughter now and again. And rum...

    In our coconut cake, of course.

    Or for a really bad cough.

    ReplyDelete
  111. Oooo, I love exposes! Dresden you did a fab job of pulling Jack out of his shell, LOL!

    Like he was really fighting it, right?

    Yay, Mary!

    Yay, Pam!

    Finalists well deserved. Do we think Jack will make an appearance at the RWA banquet?? You never know...

    Dresden, thanks cajoling Jack and when that didn't work, wooing him with your wit. Scandals abound on Unpubbed Island and only the Island knows...

    Good stuff here, LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  112. Deb, m' love, I brought your tiara! Did ye see it, m'darlin'???? I can only imagine you in it.

    Is that soldier husband of yours around? Before I say more???

    ReplyDelete
  113. Stewed pirate!

    Connealy, ye must be daft! Although there's a few pikers I'd not raise a hand to save if they ventured too near your pig pot of boilin' water.

    But chicken and dumplin's... Now there's a meal worth eating, but moreso with my New England friends.

    The Seekers have no New England friends? I wonder why this is the case?

    ReplyDelete
  114. Audra-lass, I've been waitin' the day for ye!

    (Donna' tell Madame Z....She's a bit worried, the economy and all, ye ken???)

    And Dresden, dear young soul, is a sweet young thing... Full of vim and vigor. And looking for work.

    Perhaps you could prevail on Tina to give her a chance. I hear the ferry is in need of a downstairs maid.

    ReplyDelete
  115. I read that interview peeking through laced fingers, dread pooling in my stomach.

    What Seeker Secret WOULD Jack reveal?

    Whew!

    Nothing too scandalous, PTL!

    ReplyDelete
  116. But, I have to say, that coconut cake recipe is to-die-for!

    Yum-my!

    ReplyDelete
  117. Watch out, Jack. Dresden only appears all young and innocent.

    Just when you least expect it, -wham- she'll pull the deepest, darkest secret out of you.

    Mark my words.

    And make her a maid?? Oh Pahshaw!!

    ReplyDelete
  118. Ah, Jack! You rascal you! I should have known when you didn't show up at the appointed time that I'd find you here regaling the lads 'n' lasses. But if you're REAL sweet, I'll let you borrow Ruthy's "Reunited Hearts" and Missy's "A Family for Faith" (which I picked up at a mainland shop today). But since you've been such a naughty boy today, you'll have to wait until I'M finished with them as I dislike rum-soaked covers or finding sand and sea weed between the pages--as has happened in the past.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Pam-me-darlin'!

    'Tis you and only you I've waited on this day!

    Unless you count two score of other ladies, but they mean naught!

    Of course Glynna is another wedge o' me heart!

    Books ye say, lass? Y've got copies of Ruthy's and Missy's new books?

    Two four-star novels of high renown??? What're ye holdin' back for? Don't toy wi' me woman, I'll not be gettin' sand nor rum on the pages.

    Mostly.

    ReplyDelete
  120. All right, so she canno' be a maid.

    Then we'll put her in charge of the Island Gazette, a new weekly I've been thinkin' we need to keep track of all the comin's and goin's.

    A fine young thing like her would do well with an Island paper, don' ye ken?

    I canno' be expected to do all the work.

    I'm much too busy with other pastimes. Fishing, for one.

    ReplyDelete
  121. Absolutely priceless!!! This interview with Capt. Jack is a classic - - Thanks sooo much!!
    Blessings from Georgia, Patti Jo

    p.s. Thanks for sharing Tina's cake recipe - - am trying that one for sure (maybe for Easter!)~ PJ :)

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  122. Took me all day to get here, but I'm glad I made it.

    Can't believe someone besides me has crooked toes.

    Jack, is there any rum left?

    ReplyDelete
  123. Walt, you wore a tie for Jack? You look good, but not sure Jack deserves it.

    In fact I am sure he does NOT, he is trying to hire young girls for the island. The old fart.

    ReplyDelete
  124. Wow, Dresdan

    Captain Jack,

    You have got a scoop from Captain Jack. Mercy he gets in on some gnarled parties and who knew he likes Starbucks too.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Walt, love the new pic!

    Don't tell Jack, but I saw Walt on SAT...Shhhhh.

    Also had coffee with Patti Jo this morning. Waving to you, CatMom! Didn't we have fun! We should have invited Jack to join us.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Following up on some advicee I picked up at a recent coference about keeping your picture consistent. My wife likes this one better than the other one I was using.

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  127. Tina, m'lass, young???

    Perspective, darling.

    Dresden was born in '79...

    Only young to those who are...

    not so young, dear heart o' hearts.

    And Walt, m'friend, y've sold out! Look at ye, man, a suit and tie writer with a knowing smile... It's got 'young professional kind of rogue' written all over it. And aye, there's a bit o' rum, always, for you m'friend! Herald the dawn!

    ReplyDelete
  128. An' me Georgia princess, Patty Jo! With me other Georgia peaches, Debby and Missy, of course, ladies of great pirate renown...

    A classic, am I???

    (insert knowing laugh here...)

    One of a kind, that I am! Wouldya be likin' a walk in the new dawn sun, lass???

    ReplyDelete
  129. What a great post! I loved it! Who doesn't love Captain Jack Sparrow!?! Thank you for his interview.

    Have a fantastic day!

    Smiles & Blessings,
    Cindy W.

    countrybear52[at]yahoo[dot]com

    ReplyDelete
  130. Ah, Walt, consistency.

    Yes.

    Mine has worked for centuries, tried and true.

    A pirate's life for me!

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  131. You either love coconut or hate it.
    It's like cilantro.
    but does anyone dislike Capt Jack?

    Thanks for the entertainment, Jack.

    ReplyDelete
  132. Janet has crooked toes?

    Never been a fan of Jack's but I think I've been converted.

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