Monday, May 30, 2011

Welcome Guest Blogger Debra Ullrick

How do I learn, let me count the ways.


My whole life I felt inadequate when it came to learning. I didn’t understand how someone could pick up an instruction manual and follow the step-by-step directions so easily when I, on the other hand, would struggle for hours until I’d finally concede defeat and have hubby deal with it. Well, hubby can’t figure out writing because it’s not his forte. Therefore, the lot fell onto me. And I’m so glad it did because I love to write! But I still had the problem of how to comprehend all that writing lingo. You know… like active vs. passive, show don’t tell, and head hopping. What in the tahooties was head hopping? The only way to find out, I decided, was to buy a how-to writing book. Well, hundreds of dollars and fifty-plus how-to writing books later, I still didn’t get it. Couldn’t comprehend what the books were saying. I felt stupid and inept. Had no clue what to do or how to grasp what those books or other writers were trying to teach me.

Then one day, while doing dishes, I was listening to a tape. The woman said her son felt like a failure because he couldn’t comprehend or do things as well or like her other son was able to. Boy, howdy, could I ever relate! To make a long story short, she discovered her son was doing poorly because he was a hands-on learner rather than a visual learner like her other son. She ascertained the best way for him to learn was not by telling him how things were done but by showing him and letting him do them. After that, he found his niche and excelled at it.


Hearing that sure gave me hope. All I had to do was figure out which type of learner I was: visual or hands-on. Only problem was, once again, I was faced with a dilemma of wondering what the difference was between a visual learner and a hands-on learner. Tada! Didn’t take long. A visual learner sees something and they get it, whereas a hands-on learner has to do it before they get it. Whoo hoo! Epiphany moment. All my problems would be solved if I just joined a critique group so I could have them help me hands-on. So, I did. Needless to say, all that succeeded in doing was confusing me because there were too many opinions and, as a new writer, I didn’t know who to listen to. Who was right? What the truth was. So, the end result was lots of tears, frustration, confusion, and a readiness to stop writing. Please note that I am not criticizing critique groups. We are talking about how we learn and how everyone learns differently. For some people, a critique group is a ginormous help. For me, it wasn’t. But that still left me wondering what my answer was to learning to write well. If how-to books and critique groups weren’t helping, what was left for me? Enter a famous male author who had my answer. He told me, “If you find a person who understands your writing style and voice, and doesn’t try to change them, hang onto them. They are worth their weight in gold.” He went on to say how he had found that person and what a huge difference it made for him.


Well, I have found just such a person, too. Make that, the Lord did. He placed author Staci Stallings into my path in the most unique, embarrassing, ginormous blunder way ever. Too long a story to share here. But I will say this much… make sure the person whose MS you are critiquing is the right one and not someone who is sharing their book, two chapters at a time, for free. Thankfully, Staci’s a person who listens to God. When she received my bathed-in-red critique, God told her not to react in haste. That things weren’t as they appeared. I’m so glad she heeded His warning. Because of that, not only have we become the best of friends, but she’s also my mentor and teacher. And a fabulous one at that. She doesn’t try to change my voice or style while she is teaching me hands-on, by example, and by endless repetition.

We all have our own unique way of learning. Discover yours and what works best for you when it comes to writing. Ask yourself if you are a hands-on learner, a visual learner, or perhaps you may even be an auditory learner if you learn by hearing things. Once you discover your style, it makes all the difference in the world in your writing journey.
And, if at all possible, find someone or join a critique group, if that works for you, who understands your voice and your style and who doesn’t try to change them. Someone you trust and with whom you are comfortable.

Leave a comment to get your name in a drawing for one of TWO copies of Debra's May LIH release Unexpected Bride.

Find Deb online at her website: http://www.debraullrick.com/
And her blog: http://christianromancewriter.blogspot.com/

66 comments :

  1. I am glad that you were able to stick with it and able to do what you truely enjoy. As well as learn about yourself in the process. I am sure that what you have fould has helped you in other aspects of your life as well. And taught you to never give up, thank you for sharing your story and your books.

    hillpeterson@yahoo.com

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  2. Hey Debra,

    As a former elementary teacher, I can tell you, this is something most people never understand, yet it is vital in life!

    What a blessing you continued with it and didn't give up!

    Congratulations on your success, ma'am! Like Hilleary said, thank you for sharing your story and books. Looking forward to finding out more.

    may at maythek9spy dot com

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  3. Beautiful cover Debra!

    Glad you figured that out and found a great critique partner too!

    Eva Maria Hamilton at gmail dot com

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  4. Coffee has been set up on the coffee bar and timer set.

    I really relate to this. It's comforting to find others who share our abilities or inabilities--and have found how to conquer it.

    Helen

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  5. Hi Debra, (Jenny from the goodreads group here) I would love to win your book as you know. Welcome to Seekerville
    You know its interesting you saying this as there are different ways to learn. I can read and follow things but I also need visuals to understand for example I can read how to write a report and understand but I need to see the finished product to understand it better. Or in sewing I can follow the instructions as long as there are illustrations showing what is being done.
    When I started back at studying the lecturer said there is no write way to studying, some like to take notes, some highlight and others will listen and take it in that way. I find If I try to take notes I then miss whats being said so am a listener. At conferences it can look like you are not really interested if you dont take notes but its not that way at all. I can take notes after but not while they are talking.

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  6. First, Deb, this is so true. Great words of wisdom, and welcome to Seekerville on a thought-filled, appreciative Memorial Day! And huge thank yous for coming back after the Blogger Crash of 2011...

    Wall Street is STILL SHAKING over that one, and Tina and I know that for certain!

    Your cover. THAT DRESS!!! Oh, my stars, woman, that is a RUTHY-DREAM-DRESS!!!! Isn't it just stinkin' gorgeous????

    I'm sitting here, mouth open, in awe because that's just absolutely that beauteous!

    MARY CONNEALY????? DO YOU SEE THAT DRESS? PEOPLE LOOK REALLY GOOD IN DRESSES, TOO, DARLING!

    I'm leaving quick breakfast today. Memorial Day parade in the village today, LOVE IT! We've got Danish, kuchen, donuts, bagels, assorted cream cheese, fruit and is the coffee on???

    YES! HELEN, THANK YOU, SWEETUMS!

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  7. Hi Ruthy im off to google kuchen to see what it is.

    I love the dress too. We had quite a discussion about the cover at the LIH goodreads group.

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  8. I agree with other comments about the dress--so yummy!

    Crit groups are often not very helpful. I've started about ten of them so far, and only two really worked for me. I still need to find a few more readers who get my voice, who read what I read and write, and who are able to see what I'm trying to do and help me do it better.

    That said, I'm really glad you found someone to read your work. One amazingly helpful reader is often all one needs, but without another set of eyes, a writer might not be able to tell whether what she intended is getting across on the page.

    A very thought-provoking post!

    shakespeare824 at hotmail.com

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  9. I love your cover, Debra, and appreciate this insight. I can see how difficult it is for various learning styles to adopt to the standard lecturing and reading assignments.

    It would be nice if children could be identified in this way early in their education. I think teachers are much more aware.


    I consider myself a visual learner because I have to see the process to learn it but I have to DO it to remember it.

    If someone gives me verbal directions on how to do something they might as well be speaking Spanish (Which I can only comprehend if I'm reading the words...) Illustrations--like AusJenny said--are so important!

    Please enter me in the drawing. Thanks!
    debraemarvin (at) yahooooo

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  10. Isn't it wonderful to have the support you need? I always thought of myself as an auditory learner. So that is where companions on the journey help so much.

    Love the cover. Put me in for the drawing!

    Peace, Julie

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  11. I'm so proud of people like you who hang in there and don't give up. You are an inspiration to others. I love the cover of your book (love the dress). I know it will be a great read.

    plhouston(at)bellsouth(dot)net

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  12. I understand your frustration about the critique groups. I'm learning my way through that one now. As a teacher, I often find myself frustrated trying to help a student understand a concept. It takes a while for me to figure out what type of learner each one is and then find ways to help them learn.

    I'm a visual learner. I read something and I get it. That doesn't mean I always apply it correctly, though. My frustration comes when I can't find information on what to do next. That's where a help group is, well, helpful.

    As others have stated, your cover is amazing! Count me in for the drawing please.
    teaching by writing at yahoo dot com

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  13. Welcome to Seekerville, Debra!

    I'm a visual learner and to a lesser extent, a hands-on learner. When I first started writing I read how-to books--many of them. Most were very helpful. But I didn't really apply them to my writing. Then a writer friend did a detailed critique and suddenly all my mistakes became clear!

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  14. Thanks for sharing your story, Debra. Perseverance always prevails in the end. I retain things best when I write it down and then actually do it. Have a wonderful and safe Memorial Day!

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  15. Glad to see you here today! I know it's been said already but what a beautiful cover!

    Best of luck to you.

    Rose

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  16. Yes - beautiful cover - and I'd love to read the words inside ;)

    joanne(at)joannesher(dot)com

    And this post was SO encouraging to me! SOO. Thanks for sharing.

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  17. Hello, Debra! People definitely learn in different ways. It’s great that you found what works for you! Please enter me for a chance to win your book. : )

    road_to_avonlea_17(at)yahoo(dot)com

    -Whitney

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  18. I've dealt with this experience. My older son learns differently from most and when he was younger, I had to develop ways to reach him. Colors particularly troubled him. However, I bought some "ball pit" plastic balls and I developed a game where I'd hold up balls of two different colors. I'd say something like "green" and he would have to choose the ball. Then, I would toss the correct answer to him. It took about three days to break the color barrier.

    I'm in.

    wmussell(at)hotmail(dot)com

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  19. Debra!! Welcome to Seekerville!~and thank you for sharing so honestly with us.


    Happy Memorial Day and thank you to the men and women who sacrificed for this great country.

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  20. Debra,

    Thank you for sharing today. This is so true. I did the same thing buying how-to books and taking a lot of online courses. Finally, I just started writing and that's when I found my groove.

    So glad you didn't give up!

    Kirsten
    kanavyhist[at]aol[dot]com

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  21. Hi, first thing I thought of was how funny it is to think of Shakespeare in a critique group.

    Wouldn't that be funny if he really WAS?

    Hi Shakespeare, you are making Seekerville much classier with your presence. :)

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  22. Second thing is, I think I have a mild learning disability. I've got some glitch about storing things in my long term memory. I talk to someone and it just sort of bounces off the surface of my brain without sinking in. I picture a space shuttle re-entering earth's atmospere at the wrong angle.
    I've learned coping devices IF I REMEMBER TO USE THEM. Lists. Keeping my Yahoo Calendar up to date. Putting commitments into the calendar IMMEDIATELY.
    But it is soooooo common for me to have two things planned for the same day. I just do this ALL the time. And the way it usually works is, it's something I WANT to do and something I HAVE to do. I can be planning both for quite a while before it suddenly snaps into place that 'I CAN'T DO THAT SATURDAY, I'VE GOT TO DO .... whatever.
    I have an impression of planning things on the right and left side of my brain. One side for fun, one for work.

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  23. And my I just add, to everyone I've failed by being gone when I said I'd be there.............



    I'm so sorry.

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  24. Third, I have to say, that is the most beautiful cover, Deb. Really, really beautiful. Love Inspired did a wonderful job for you.

    And as for RUTHY and her comment about me and dresses, it is a simple fact that I haven't had a dress on since my last child got married.

    To give you an idea how long ago that was, their second child is almost three months old.

    I'm just at a time in my life when very little is worth being uncomfortable for. Very, Very little.
    And I wore the same floor length black skirt for the two daughter's weddings.

    I bought different sparkly tops. I see no reason to buy a new black skirt for the next two daughters.
    Last year at ACFW I bought a THIRD sparkly top for the Carol Awards ceremony. But didn't bring the black skirt. I am wearing it at RWA though. Ruthy (in fact all the Seekers) tell me I have to.

    :( It's gonna get wrinkly and I'll look stupid, but then I write comedy so I guess it's okay. Clown pants would work better though.

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  25. And dressy black pants can be very formal looking. (admit it, Ruthy!)

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  26. Thanks so much Debra for your post! I felt like I had one of those "Aha!" moments when you were sharing about the different learning styles. I'm definitely a 'hands-on' learner:) I've found that critique groups aren't necessarily the best for me either(although I know it helps tons of people)...I've been asking God for a mentor to work with me who understands my writing style and voice like you did:) Anyway, your post gives me hope, so I really appreciate you sharing:) Thanks!

    I would love to be entered for a chance to win a copy of your book!

    lornafaith at gmail dot com

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  27. So glad you shared your experience here, Debra! I love to hear how God works things out for each of us to receive the instruction and encouragement we need. And for you the result is your beautiful book. Congratulations!

    reneeasmith61 [at] yahoo [dot] com

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  28. Great post, Debra. I'm a visual and hands-on learner.

    Definitely NOT auditory!

    I've never broken it down to whether I'm more visual or hands-on though. I'll have to think about that...

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  29. Oh.My.Stars!

    Shakespeare is HERE in Seekerville!

    I see Vince, Shakespeare, and Captain Jack huddled over in the corner, sipping coffee and eating kuchen (whatever that is!).

    I'd like to be fly on the wall during that convo...

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  30. DEBRA!!!! It is SOOOOOO wonderful to see you here, my friend and GREAT post -- VERY encouraging!!

    And you are SO right when you say, "If you find a person who understands your writing style and voice, and doesn’t try to change them, hang onto them."

    AMEN TO THAT!! I remember how very hurt I was when my dear friend and prayer partner (who happens to be an English teacher who teaches writing!!!) read my first ms., A Passion Most Pure, and said it was "too intense" for her and wanted to know why I couldn't just write a "sweet" romance without all the tension. "Because I would fall asleep on the keyboard?" I responded innocently, wounded to the core that she didn't "get" me or my writing. And so I realized right then and there that not everyone will understand your style, but when you DO find someone who does, NAB 'EM!!! And I have to say, Deb, that YOU were one of the first people who encouraged and "got me" and my style -- THANK YOU so very much for that and your precious friendship.

    I echo everyone's comments that your cover is TO DIE FOR, and I know from personal experience that what's inside is just as good. :) Can't wait to read it, my friend.

    Hugs,
    Julie

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  31. PS it's really not about the skirt. It's about the panty hose.

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  32. Debra,

    Very inspiring post! I used to be a good learner, but then menopause started. Brain doesn't seem to work as well! LOL.

    So I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who's slow to pick up this writing thing!

    How long after you started working with Staci did you make your first sale?

    Oh, and Mary, HIGH FIVE. I am SO with you on the dress thing! And you're right - it's about the pantihose (and the shoes). I love the look of high heels, but cannot wear them without blisters and pain. Dressy pants are so much better! I'm thinking of buying my first dress in about 12 years for the ACFW Awards night. Do you think it's worth it? Or will dress pants do?

    Cheers,
    Sue
    sbmason at sympatico dot ca

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  33. I wore dressy black pants last year.
    No one died as a result.

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  34. Though Ruthy had to be temporarily hositalized.

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  35. Debra,
    Great article - full of information we can all use.

    edwina(dot)cowgill(at)yahoo(dot)com

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  36. Hoorah -- Blogger recognizes me today! It blocked me out most of last week.

    I agree with everyone else -- love the cover of your book, Debra! I bet the story inside is just as good.

    I'm a kind of hands-on-learner too only I'm a do-it-wrong-the-first-time-hands-on-learner. We're a unique brand and there ought to be a support group for us.

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  37. I'm a bit of a mix of hands-on, and visual. Sometimes I can watch someone do something, then do it myself, other times, I have have them help me through. I struggled through school in certain areas because I couldn't pick up what I was being taught.

    Same with my writing, it took me a few years to get certain things cause I didn't understand how to do something my CP's were telling me I wasn't doing, other things I picked up right away by reading.

    My husband has learned to work with both aspects for his future students. We see it in our kids and the differences amaze us.

    iacuttergirl at gmail dot com

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  38. My daughter is an auditory learning. She never remembers anything she reads--her mind wanders. But if you tell her something she remembers. Not surprising that she's a good pianist and loves music. Forget about books. Oh, well.

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  39. I agree with everyone else about the gorgeous dress and bookcover. Congratulations!

    I'm definitely a "learn by doing" sort of person. It took years to figure this out, but when I did, it helped so much - not only in my writing and at work, but also in teaching/training others in how to do things.

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  40. Hi everyone! Thanks for stopping by.

    Hilleary, I'm glad I stuck with it to. I may get knocked down, but I don't stay down. I come up fighting. In a good way, that is. *smiling*

    KC Frantzen, I wish I would have known the way I learned when I was going through school. Maybe, just maybe it might have helped me get better grades. Thank you for your warm wishes on my continued success.

    Eva Maria Hamilton, I'm glad I figured it out too. hehe My critique partner is awesome! She's sooooo patient with me and has never given up on me even when I would have.

    Helen Gray, I think a lot of people can relate. But, if they are like I was, I was too embarrassed and ashamed to admit it. Hopefully, this post will help people realize that we all learn differently and that we're not "stupid".

    Ausjenny, waving profusely at ya, girl! Of course I know you. I remember you from the ACFW bookclub too.
    I think we all need to discover what works for us and not worry about what others think. Like you, taking notes during a class doesn't work for you. Therefore, don't do it. Who cares what others think. Okay, so I do, but I shouldn't. hehehe And I'm getting better about not worrying about what someone else thinks. Ah such freedom. hehe

    Ruth Logan Herne, thanks for the welcome. And there was no way I was going to miss my chance to be on Seekerville. Neither ran, nor sleet, nor Blogger crash...wait...isn't that a mailman's saying? Well, minus the Blogger crash of course. But, then again, even that might be. hehe

    You should have seen MY face when I first laid eyes on that cover and that dress. I cried like a baby. And, the worst part of it all was...I couldn't share it with anyone for over a month.

    Mary isn't the only one who doesn't do dresses. My legs haven't seen daylight for thirty years.

    I know what kuchen is. My grandparents, my mom's parents, are Russians from Germany. And my dad's parents were German too and all spoke fluent German. In fact, I kind of give a hint of what my ancestry is about in my upcoming novella in a 9 book compilation titled: A Log Cabin Christmas, coming out in September of this year.

    Okay, I'm going to send this one, and continue commenting in another post.

    Thank you everyone for stopping by.
    You all rock!!!

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  41. Shakespeare, I had the same problem with crit groups. Joined many of then and they never worked for me. However, I've had friends who say they never would have made it without their crit groups. (Again, I want to make it clear that I am not bashing or criticizing critique groups. They just didn't work for me because of the way I learn.) Shakespeare, don't give up looking for that person or persons who does get your voice and who's willing to help you make it better. They're out there.

    Debra E. Marvin, it sure would be awesome if every child had the opportunity to discover the way they learn and then have the opportunity to learn the way that best fits them.

    I'm a hands on and visual learner. My mind will photograph something. I had over 4K books and I knew where everyone of them was. I could "see" the binding, the shelf it was on, the color etc. But, when it comes to writing, I'm not visual. I'm hands on. Probably sounds contradicting, but I'm sure others can relate.

    I so understand what you mean about another language when someone tries to give you verbal directions. When they do, my mind will get stuck on something and stay there. I usually have to stop the person and ask what that means before I can follow them. Drives my husband nuts. He thinks I'm being rude, but I tell him that that is how my mind works and would he rather have me get it or stop him and ask him what he means so I can follow him after that. He's learned it's best to let me interrupt him. hehhe

    Julie Hilton Steele, you are soooo right. It's fabulous having the support I need and I never take it for granted. Wow, so you "hear" something and get it?! That is so amazing. Not me.

    Patsy, I'm SO glad I could inspire someone. It is hard to share our hearts sometimes, but I'm so glad I did. If I can help one person by pouring out how dumb I felt for years, then that makes me one happy camper.

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  42. Sorry, gang, gotta run a few errands. I will be back to respond to the rest of your posts.

    Thank you for taking the time on this special Holiday where we remember our armed forces who gave their lives for the freedom we share and for the loved ones we have lost.

    See ya later~ ~ ~

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  43. Debra, it was like you were talking to me and about me. I'm a hands-on-learner, too. Which probably explains why I've been seriously writing for 6 yrs and still haven't rec'd 'the call'. I'm moving slowly, learning by experience every step of the way.

    Much of that is due to Gwen Stewart who has been my critique partner and cheerleader for 3 years. Gwen gets me and my writing and so I don't send anything out without running it by her first.

    And then I'm blessed to belong to the Inkwell Inspirations blog where Deb Marvin and Susie Dietze express interest in critting everything I write, although they say they just like sending a red-marked manuscript back. :?

    These 3 writers have different views and different voices and yet I know they each have my best interest at heart. That matters when I'm looking at the red writing and wondering if the suggested change really matters.

    Great book cover, Debra. Absolutely outstanding. Can't wait to read this one.

    Anita Mae.
    anitamaedraper (at) hotmail dot com

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  44. Another fun day on Seekers....the dress vs. pants is interesting! I prefer pants, also. Debra the cover is beautiful, and I would love to read your book. Please enter me in the drawing and thanks for your post.

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  45. Deb, welcome!! I loved your post today. And I'm still cracking up about the critique you sent to Staci! As we say in the south, "Bless her heart!" :)

    I'm a visual learner. My daughter is forever reading math problems out loud to me for help. And I have to hold up my hand to stop her, to tell her I have to SEE it. I just can't learn if someone is reading to me. And I've always found that during tests, I can "see" the answers to questions right where they are on the page in my notes (in my mind, of course. no cheating allowed.). I think that ability has always helped me test well--even if only in short term memory! :) (sshh. Don't tell my former teachers!)

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  46. Loves 2 Read Romance - LauraMay 30, 2011 at 2:42 PM

    Hi Debra! Thanks for sharing and rescheduling with us. I love the cover of your book!! What a great topic. I agree with the others if we could identify what type of learner we are when we were younger it would help the teacher as the teach. I would love to win your book!


    fantum2004ATsbcglobalDOTnet

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  47. a great posting...and what a beautiful cover to your novel, debra...thanks for the opportunity to read it :)

    karenk
    kmkuka at yahoo dot com

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  48. Christine Long, I can understand your frustration in trying to help a student understand a concept. If only teachers had time to figure out which way they learn, but there isn't enough of you to go around a classroom full of students. I'm just glad that I have a Staci in my life. *smiling*

    Cara Lynn James, the same thing happened to me. When my friend did a detailed critique and made comments in a way that I could understand, the concepts starting coming to life for me.

    Jillian, you're welcome. Perseverance definitely prevails in the end. I'm soooo glad I didn't quit. Hope your Memorial Day is a memorable one. Hmmm isn't that what Memorial Day is supposed to be...a memorable one? Oh well. hehe

    Rose, thank you for stopping by. It's awesome being here amongst such a wonderful group. I love the cover too!!!

    Joanne Sher, thank you for stopping by. I'm so glad this post encouraged you. And you are quite welcome.

    Whitney, I love the picture of Elizabeth Bennett. You must be a Jane Austen fan too. The Unexpected Bride was birthed from my love of Jane Austen and the British culture. I also love the south so I combined the two worlds and put them into one person...my heroine, Rainelle Victoria Devonwood.

    Walt, that’s awesome that you were willing to find out what would help your son. It's amazing how it doesn't take much for them to "get it" once the method for helping them and using it is discovered. Thanks for stopping by.

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  49. Auditory learning is about the last on my list. I retain a lot of what I read, but like you said, there's no substitute for getting your hands in there and practicing. In fact, I tend to read a writing how-to book (or two) between manuscripts, trying to consolidate what I'm already doing right, then practicing the next step.

    I'd love to win your book.

    valerie at valeriecomer dot com

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  50. Hi Tina, thanks for the warm welcome. It was my pleasure to share my struggles. Especially if it will help even one person to stop feeling like there are stupid because they couldn't catch on or learn. They're not stupid, we just have to figure out which way we learn and go from there.

    Kirsten Arnold, you're welcome. I'm sooo glad you found what worked for you too. Sure makes things a whole heap easier.

    Hi Mary, ~waving like an idiot at ya~ hehe

    Love Inspired did do a wonderful job. I'd love to send that cover designer a gift.

    I don't do dresses because I'm all goat roper. (For those of you who don't know what a goat roper is, that was a term they called us cowgirls in high school. Never roped a goat in my life, a few calves, but no goats. And running around three barrels isn't roping a goat either. So, don't know why they called us that. *grin*) If I could, I would live in my cowboy boots, chewed out jeans at the bottom, my belts with my name on them, and puffy sleeved blouses. NO DRESSES FOR DEBRA! YUK! hehe

    Lorna Faith, I'm thrilled that you had an "Aha" moment reading my post. Once I discovered how I learned and that I could learn, I no longer felt stupid. Made a huge difference in the self esteem area, for sure. I pray God send you your special mentor-someone soon.

    Renee Ann, God sure did work it all out. There was no way I could have contrived any of it. I'm not that smart or talented to. hehe

    Hi Pam! Thanks for stopping. Have fun figuring out which one or two you are.

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  51. Be back to comment on the rest after bit. More chores to run. Cat's gotta eat. Don't know why, but she does. hee hee Plus, the Dairy Queen and a Peanut Buster Parfait is calling my name. And I always obey when I'm being called. NOT! Unless it's food. hehehe

    Catch ya all later...

    Oh and thanks for having me on Seekerville, Mary. This is SOOO fun. Everyone here rocks!

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  52. Mary I hear you. I HATE pantyhose. who ever invented them should be strung up. (doesn't help be alergic to nylon either). I do wear dresses and skirts in summer but I dont wear pantyhose. in Winter when I go out its dress pants.

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  53. JULIE, JULIE, JULIE! HEY GIRLFRIEND!! How ya doin'? It is so awesome to see you here and to be here too. I'm glad my post was so encouraging.
    Wow, I didn't know I was one of the first people to "get you". I love your stories! And, I'm SOOO glad you didn't listen to that person, even if they meant well. I had to laugh at your comment about falling asleep at the keyboard. hehe

    No, thank YOU for your friendship. I'm blessed to have you in my life. God is SOOO good!!!!

    Ah, aren't you the sweetest thing ever to say that what's inside is just as good as outside. Hope you still feel that way whenever you read it. *smiling*

    Thanks for stopping by, Julie.
    Luv ya, girl.

    hahahaa Mary, what a riot. Panty hose are only good for one thing...a slingshot. hehe

    Susan Anne Mason, I'm so glad you found my post inspiring. And boy, howdy, do I understand about menopause. The brain turns to marshmallows--someone else has to finish your sentences--and your husband runs for the hills. hehe

    Nope, you're not alone in being slow to pick up writing. If there was something slower than a slug or turtle, that would be me. *smiling*

    Edwina, thank you for your comment about the article. I appreciate it that you thought it was great. Whew. hehe Thanks for stopping by.

    Kav, I hope everyone thinks the story is as good inside as the cover is outside. *Over here crossing my fingers, toes, eyeballs, legs, nose...wait...scratch the nose, can't cross it. hehe
    Well at least you're only a wrong-the-first-time-hands-on-learner. I'm more like twenty-times-wrong-hands-on-er. *smiling* We need support alright. The mental kind. hehehehe

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  54. Winter, thank you for stopping by. I, too, struggled in school. I used to ask the teachers to help me. They would try a couple of times and then after that give up on me. I don't blame them.

    That's awesome that your husband has learned to work with both. A lot of people don't have the time or won't take the time to figure out how to help their kids. It takes a lot of patience, which I sorely lack. Good thing my child is grown. *smiling*

    Cara Lynn James, my daughter learned by reading. She had a horrible time with reading in school. We home schooled her for a few years and either bought her all the books she wanted or took her to the library. About a year later her reading improved tremendously. In fact, it was her that got me started on reading. And because she got me started on reading, I then started writing. Bless her little pea pickin' heart. *smiling*

    Anita Mae Draper, my learning was slow too. But persistence paid off. I don't send anything out without running it by Staci either. She's my security blanket. But, she's also a fabulous enough teacher that I'm getting better and better about knowing how I want to say things and about doing it better. Still not ready to be weaned though. *smiling*

    Jackie S., thank you for stopping by. Thanks for the compliment on the cover.

    Hi Missy Tippens!! ~waving at ya like the Beverly Hillbillies Granny~ Awesome to see you on here.

    Staci and I still crack up every time we talk about the mix-up. Well, she laughs, I still balk. hehe

    I don't learn if someone is reading to me, either. I have to read it and moll it over and over. That's why every non-fiction book I get are so marked up. No one likes to read them after I've gotten my grubby little hands on them. hehe

    And your secret is safe with me. I won't tell your former teachers. Now, what were their names again... *grin*

    Loves 2 Read Romance - Laura, I'm SOOO glad I rescheduled. I wouldn't have wanted to miss this for the world. I'm glad you enjoyed the topic. Good luck on winning a copy of my book!! Thanks for stopping by.

    karenk, glad you thought the post was great and that you love the cover. You're welcome for the opportunity to read it. I wish I could send everyone a copy.

    Valerie Comer, I wish I could get something out of all my how-to books. I sure tried, but just couldn't comprehend what they were saying. Now, that I understand more, I understand what they're saying more. But at the time...Yikes! The only thing I understood was how frustrated I was getting. *grin* Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

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  55. I'm a hands on/visual learner. Often I have work right along side the person teaching me, doing each step together, again and again. Math is this way for me. Crochet. Cooking. I can follow a recipe, but if I've never seen someone make the thing, I'll take twice as long as necessary the first time I do it.

    Writing...I'm just starting out. But I think reading the book and blogs etc. really helps me. I find I enjoy reading more now that I've learned a little about writing. I notice when the authors do the things I've learned. I also notice when they don't.

    What a fun post!

    I'd love to win the book:

    andeemarie95 AT gmail DOT com

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  56. Andrea Strong, welcome. When I used to crochet, I did real good at first because my friend was right along side me teaching me. Well, when we moved away and it came to different types of stitches, I couldn't do them. Even bought step by step directions with pictures and I still couldn't do them. Not without someone walking me through them each step of the way a few times.

    I know what you mean about noticing when authors don't do what we've learned. I actually despise that part. That is the time I wish I hadn't learned to write. Never noticed any of that stuff before. I will say though, I now make it a point to read without my editor's cap on.

    Thanks for stopping.

    Happy writing!!!

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  57. Great post, Debra--thanks for sharing this with us. And your book cover is beautiful! May the Lord bless you and your writing.
    Blessings from Georgia, Patti Jo

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  58. Hey, CatMom, I love your photo. I LOVE cats! Thank you for your blessing. That was so awesome!!! And thank you for stopping by, Patti Jo.

    THANK YOU ONE AND ALL FOR MAKING MY DAY ON SEEKERVILLE!!!

    GOD BLESS YOU AND YOURS!

    Debra

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  59. Tamela Hancock MurrayMay 30, 2011 at 11:32 PM

    What an inspiring post! I'm so proud to represent you, Deb!

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  60. BTW Debra, I am (or have been) a real goat roper. Ornery little things. So if you every want the low down, I'm your gal. LOL

    Anita Mae.

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  61. You and I both learn by doing. Thanks for sharing your struggle...it will, hopefully, help someone else who is stumbling down their own path ...and give them hope.

    Have a great day,

    Sandy

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  62. In my earlier years I was a visual learner. Now after losing a few 'grey cells' (age creeped up on me somewhere) I find I am more of a hands on learner.

    Thank you for the great post! Would love to win a copy of your book Debra.

    Smiles & Blessings,
    Cindy W.

    countrybear52[at]yahoo[dot]com

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  63. Looking forward to reading your book!

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  64. Looking forward to reading your book!

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  65. Thanks for sharing. I can relate to your story.

    I struggled in school because they taught the way most kids learn, not the way each kid learns. I did well in art and applied science because they were hands-on. I was put into remedial English where I sat in dull room going over sentence structure in a dull manual with no graphics to illustrate the lesson. Huh? I didn't get it. One teacher wrote in the margin of my paper, "Learn to use commas!" Why didn't she teach me to use commas? To this day I'm still comma shy.

    In my senior year of high school I wanted to take the creative writing class but they said I couldn't. I actually stood up for myself and they relented. However, I was the only student in the class who took it in addition to senior English while the others took it instead of senior English. I remember more from that class than any other of my academic classes.

    Too bad it was so many years later that I realized my grades weren't as good as my older brother's because we learned in different ways.

    It also took me many years before I realized that I can write novels, even though I still might not get the sentence structure right, or put in too many comma. :-)

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  66. I'd love to win a Love inspired book thanks

    ABreading4fun [at] gmail [dot] com

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