Friday, August 24, 2012

Taking the ME out of Social MEdia

I recently discovered that there are 1440 minutes in a day. This came on the heels of my Twitter account being hacked. Pay attention, there is a correlation here.


Perhaps you should sit down first.


I want you all to know that I am not a cool person.


I have never been cool. Today I opened up my Facebook account for the first time in two weeks and discovered I have new 85 virtual strangers who want to be my virtual friend. Add that to the 731 virtual strangers who already are my virtual friends. 


I just want to ask...WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE? 

Why do you want to be my friend? Seriously, peeps. Full disclosure... I am boring.


In a normal day (besides the folks at work or church, none of whom BTW are my Facebook friends) I encounter possibly three people, all on the way to the day job. The nice clerk at the grocery store who thinks my name is Regina (I don't have the heart to tell her that's not my name), Joe at 7-11 who I give my $.99 cents to for a refill of a diet Dr. Pepper with a dash of vanilla and on occasion the guy with the ponytail (Frank?) who handles my Seekerville mailings.

 I go to work, I write books, I attend to a few other life needs. That's it.

 I'm a writer. I don't have time for friends. And I mean that in the nicest possible way.

I recently started to rethink this whole, you want to be my FB friend, you want to follow me on Twitter (before I killed the bird), add me to your Google circle, Pinterest, yada yada phenomena.

Here's how I see it...


Sometime in early 2000 there was a meeting in a corporate office somewhere and it involved lots of delivery pizza and Mountain Dew. Clearly this was as important as the meeting that brainwashed us into believing and perpetuating the following:

1. Real women wear size 2
2. You can have it all.
3. You will look like Carmen Elektra if you eat Doritos




At the end of said meeting, (above, pay attention) it was decided that with the demise of MySpace people needed another way to be cool so that corporate giants could make money off our paranoia and nightmares of elementary school gym class.

Like a virtual dodgeball team picking scenario...we all want to be LIKED!  

Thus the dawn of social media as we know it. (What Type of Social Media Personality ARE YOU??-Infographic)



 Have you seen the movie The Social Network? Facebook was created by a geek with social phobia to play off OUR insecurities and we fed right into it!



My  paranoia unfortunately is growing. Watch the video and then let the last words haunt you.

"I am a big fan of any social networking site. It allows me to interact with my fans without having to see, hear or smell them." 


So why DO we believe Facebook will sell our books? Because someone in a  publicity office of a publishing house told us so?

Check out the Infographic on the topic.

Has social media has gotten you a book contract, or has soared anyone you personally know onto the New York Times list?   NYT Combined Print & E Book Fiction

Let's take a look at this year's list of Forbes Top Earning Authors

James Patterson
Stephen King
Janet Evanovich
John Grisham
Jeff Kinney
Bill O'Reilly
Nora Roberts
Danielle Steele
Suzanne Collins
Dean Koontz
JK Rowling
George R R Martin
Stephanie Meyer
Ken Follett
Rick Riordin



 What about their social media presence? Yes, it's there all right. (Thanks to a high priced publicist who pays someone to do the author's social media for them.) 

But what came first, the chicken or the egg? The book or the author? I guarantee (except for TV journalist Bill O'Neil) you it was the book. (And on a random segue-when was the last time you got a REAL LIVE personal Tweet from them about weight loss? You got one from me!!)


Bottom line??


I don't believe social media sells books.

Here are some articles that seem to suggest I might be right or at least on the right track. If you only have time to read one of these read Ewan Morrison's from the Uk Gaurdian!










What I do believe is that social media connects and cultivates relationships. Which obviously I am in need of. I don't go to Facebook to sell my books, I go to visit. So thank you for for taking pity on my friendless, boring, introverted,  ISTJ soul.



So what's the moral of this post?? Social media should be a seasoning that adds to your life, not the entire life. 

If you're only there to hawk books, maybe you should rethink your marketing plan.

 
Random notice...I love this ad Toyota Facebook Commercial.

BTW, I'm cold turkey off Twitter. I'm working toward Facebook Detox.


  "Facebook has turned into a national obsession that results in vast amounts of time lost and innately encourages narcissism."





 If you're spending 4+ hours a day on social media consider that possibly that time would be better spent living, or ...writing...



Writing.


Writing.


Writing.


Because the best way to sell that book is to write another, and another and another.

Yes, it's true, there are only 1440 minutes in a day. 

As for  you and ME? 

We need to get our fannies in the chair and get writing!



Tina Radcliffe spends most of her time juggling her day job at a large national mail order pharmacy, writing inspirational romance and trying to fit into her crime fighting outfit. She lives in a cave in the foothills of Colorado.







I've given you at minimum, lots of links to check out. At max, your own decision to make. It isn't necessary to agree with me about anything. Most smart people don't.

Comment today. SHARE your opinion on taking the ME out of Social MEdia for some special opportunities:



1. If you aren't one of the 3,000 peeps who I have already mailed a FREE copy of my Carol Award finaling book by Harlequin Love Inspired, Oklahoma Reunion, let me know. Two copies are up for grabs. Digital or Traditional.


2. If you are attending ACFW, I'm buying! Let's chat, REAL TIME. Seriously. I'll buy the beverage and dessert of your choice and we can mumble greetings, avoid eye contact and/or check our phone messages then attempt awkward conversation.  One winner.


3. Because there will always be a special place in my heart for lurkers.  ( I personally lurk on 29 Yahoo groups.) I'm offering a $10.00 Amazon gift card to one lurker who posts today.


Winners announced in the Weekend Edition. (That gives you approximately 24 hours folks!)




 *All information shared in this post is the solely the opinion of the paranoid, friendless author of this post and does not necessarily reflect the views of Seekerville.*

121 comments :

  1. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Tina. You have just lowered my anxiety level by THAT much.

    I have a Facebook account and a web page, but I can't bear the thought of more than that. I don't make adequate use of what I have. :(

    I just finished Oklahoma Reunion. Thank you for selling that manuscript!!

    I don't think I qualify as a lurker.

    But I AM planning to be at ACFW conference! I'm hooking up with Carol Moncado and some others for the drive. Getting geared up for it.

    Got the coffee pot set.

    Helen

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  2. How can I not comment for a chance to win awkward conversation?

    Though I'm not sure why I need one considering every new person I meet gives me the courtesy of an awkward conversation, it certainly can't be my fault, it has to be them...

    Oh wait, free dessert. Have you all figured out I'm a cheapskate yet? Put me in for dessert!! not that I need that either....

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  3. Tina! Yes! "Social media should be a seasoning that adds to your life, not the entire life."

    I know several people whose lives revolve around Facebook and really, their lives are a mess.

    Whew! I am so glad that social media will not be the be all and end all to my "marketing plan". It will be writing, writing, writing, and I will use social media occasionally, I 'like' it. Thank you Tina!

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  4. I would like a chance to win your book!

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  5. Tina! Yes! "Social media should be a seasoning that adds to your life, not the entire life."

    I know several people whose lives revolve around Facebook and really, their lives are a mess.

    Whew! I am so glad that social media will not be the be all and end all to my "marketing plan". It will be writing, writing, writing, and I will use social media occasionally, I 'like' it. Thank you Tina!

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  6. Hello, fellow ISTJ. Our problem could be that although we know the rest of the world would be much better off if they thought like we did... we have a sneaking suspicion that they don't.

    While I'm not sure that social media will sell books to me, my marketing self says that you have to engage people in the way that they want to be engaged. For some people, this is social media.

    But for an author, the balance should be 80/20 in favour of writing, not 99/1 in favour of social media.

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  7. Ha!!! You guys are a hoot. Sure you don't want me to send you an offer for free Viagra? I did that last year when I was hacked.

    This year it's only weight loss tips.

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  8. WELCOME LOLA.

    I agree 80/20. Write that book.

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  9. Melissa J. See, I am not alone.

    Thank YOU!!!

    Mumble,mumble, mumble.

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  10. OMGosh. I love you. With all my boring heart.

    Okay, I also love facebook because I have met some amazzzzzing friends on there. They have not helped me sell books. They have encouraged me to keep writing books to sell. (As opposed to sliding under the bed and forgetting about.)

    I thought it was so funny that we HAD to have a facebook account, then Twitter linked, then the website (MUST BLOG), and then it was an author page, and THEN it was an Amazon page.

    yeah, it wasn't just a marketing group in the 90's. there are people who do this all day, every day. Telling us how to be famous.

    That said.... continued below for the other side of it...

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  11. Now, what you said about connections is very true.

    i've connected to authors on facebook ebcause my children love their books. Surprise, we have things in common such as kids the same age, we homeschool, we like to paint, we write late at night, etc.

    This 'connection' with them has nudged me several times to buy their next book (or their series, or extras of their book to give to friends) because I want to support my friend.

    Without that personal connection, I probably would not have bought 'The Magic Thief' in GERMAN and mailed it half-way around the world to my children's penpal. But because Sarah Prineaus is a fabulous human being and thinks my kids are cute, it seemed like a better choice than anything else.

    The human connection may not boos sales 'significantly' but readers and writers getting together makes for a happy combo.

    Oh, and I also won a few arguments over plot hints with my kids this way. We'd argue, then I'd ask them on facebook, and they'd tell me who was right!

    End of bickering over whether author meant biscuits American style or biscuits like British cookies? Priceless.

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  12. p.S. Scott Westerfeld wrote a YA series starting with 'Uglies'.

    The latest was called 'Specials' and it's set in a futuristic society where the more famous you are, the more food/money/clothing etc. you get. The only way to rise above your current economic status is to get famous.

    Brilliant book. Made my kids read it.

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  13. Hi Tina, I have to say I agree with you. I think FB can help you get to know people with authors who have pages but cant say its made me buy a book. I tend to play games on fb and think its more anti social than social in many ways.

    I have bought books because of blogs and also goodreads where I am on a few group that interact with authors. The LIH group is wonderful.

    I have your book so dont enter me. Oh on lurking I do that with many goodreads groups and fb groups. I have been know to lurk at a cricket game before!

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  14. I know, Virginia. The MUST HAVES or you are an author marketing loser.

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  15. You, Jenny, are my favorite Aussie lurker.

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  16. Well said. I thought this from the beginning and got into social media kicking and screaming all the way. I thought if I waited long enough, the phase would pass. I'm working up to author page and website, which I see as a traffic sign referring to other places. I'd much rather be a monthly blogger on other sites.'m Now that I'm "getting up to speed, I'm reading about how authors are opting out. Glad I got the memo. Back to writing.

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  17. Mary F!!!! Another one joins the ranks! Write ON!!

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  18. I couldn't agree more about time wasted on Facebook and Twitter. Why do people think we care that they just finished baking a chicken? "Facebook has turned into a national obsession that results in vast amounts of time lost and innately encourages narcissism." So true! Is that your quote, Tina? That being said, I admit, I have purchased many books after discovering them through blogs or Facebook chatter.

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  19. I am an ISTJ! And I have taken the test over and over and the results are always the same If you haven't read the recent research, introverts actually rule the world (in the back office,of course).

    Please enter me in your drawing, personality-sister by another mother.

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  20. Paranoid, friendless author????

    WHAT DOES THAT MAKE US, RADCLIFFY???? MERE ACQUAINTANCES??????????

    I love this post because social media is addicting to folks.

    Folks who should be folding laundry.

    Washing floors.

    Cleaning cat boxes.

    Buying food.

    :)

    I've made it a habit to pop into facebook and let people laugh at me and the kids' antics a couple of times a day. Some days I don't get there at all because computer time is scarce... other days, I might stop in a half-dozen times. And now I can upload from my new phone, so it makes it fun to show what's happenin'...

    Even if it's just a rooster crowin'.

    But Teeeeena, you're right, we're being led by the nose.

    I would rather write.

    Write.

    Write.

    So I use it in some applications, I avoid Twitter like the plague because it's senseless nonsense and there's already plenty of that in everyone's life, and my prediction is that the whole thing is going to blow up figuratively in the not too distant future and we'll all be saying "That was stupid".

    We'll see!

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  21. TINA! It's just after 7AM here, and I'm laughing like crazy. Your way of describing so many of us (raising hand here) is hilarious :D

    Besides that, your advice to limit social media and write more is bang-on. You can have a zillion friends and followers, but if you don't have a good product, they won't buy it. Period, end of story.

    No need to put me in the drawing. Just wanted to high-five you for ending my week on a fun note.

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  22. my husband has a Facebook account - I don't. We share it to keep tabs on what his teen (who lives with her mom in Pennsylvania)is doing.

    I'm not a writer...yet. Still trying to adjust to full time work and a toddler who demands "mommy" time as soon as I hit the door after work. but i'm all for minimizing social media time (Lord knows I waste enough time already with other little stuff).

    I would love an ebook version of your book. too many books, not enough bookshelves around my house.

    it appears i'm still mired in the 20th century and haven't caught up with the 21st *sigh*

    i do visit Seekerville and two other blogs daily. the information gold here and at the others is ALWAYS well worth the time. (btw, i didn't click any of the links...sorry. i'm sure that took time to set up, but my work break is only so long...)

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  23. "Facebook has turned into a national obsession that results in vast amounts of time lost and innately encourages narcissism."

    SO TRUE!

    Thanks for this frank post, Tina, I loved it :) I've read Ewan Morrison's article before, and I totally agree.

    I already have Oklahoma Reunion, and won't be at the ACFW this year ... or next ... or the year after that ... lol but God willing, some day!

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  24. Yay! I get to meet Tina in person at the ACFW conference! Not that I'm planning on winning the dessert/beverage, I just plan on 'hunting' down the Seekerville ladies to say hi....and we'll probably be at the same publisher event too!

    I think websites/blogs are a better tool to help writer's gain a presence. Does it help you sell books? Maybe.

    Facebook? Not so much....

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  25. Thanks, Tina.

    I keep reading agents want us to have a good online presence. I've struggled with this because I'm not published yet and who really has time for that. BUT I go on FB and it doesn't take long to spot the narcissists.

    I struggle with my blog, I don't think I have enough interesting things to say.

    My secret to Twitter is I retweet a lot, probably doesn't count, but oh well.

    I'd love to win a conversation with you. If we can't think of anything to say we can start with pharmacy talk. Counting me we have 4 pharmacists in my family & my hubby jokes that all conversations come back to pharmacy. Ha!

    Enjoyed your post today!

    Jackie L.

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  26. Oh goodie, I wake up this morning and have been given permission to feel smug because I don't have a facebook page! Bwahhhaahhhaahha! No Pinterest account. And I don't tweet or twitter -- unless I'm trying to engage Mrs. Cardinal (who lives in the tree out back) into a conversation. She often has deep insights into weather and bug control. :-)

    I have to admit to sometimes feeling left out though -- but not enough to start up a facebook account.

    Loved the articles and the Facebook/CIA video in particular. What a hoot!!!

    Blogs and author webpages have definitely sold me on authors though so I think they make more sense as far as a marketing tool goes.

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  27. Great blog, Tina.
    I am so NOT a social media person, although I'm on FB and Twitter.

    Both are a means of getting info out about my books or blogs or whatever. Nothing too personal. And no pics of my children or grandchildren. That's a hard and fast rule for me, although they are beautiful and handsome and adorable! :)

    That being said, I have recently tried to be more present on FB. Always see a few real friends there and like being able to "chat" a bit with them. But I've allowed everyone to be a friend...well, except the guy who wanted to meet me in a Third World Country, if I brought money. He isn't my friend. Everyone else is. So again, nothing personal gets out.

    I believe Stan Williams, of Moral Premise fame, has disconnected from social media in order to have time to devote to his ministry. Don't quote me, but that's what I believe he sent out some weeks ago.

    We talked about suspense stories with Jordyn this week. I recall a Dean Kootz novel, years ago, that had computers taking over people's minds. At the end of the story--spoiler alert--folks sat at computer terminals and interacted online, yet they never interacted one on one. At the time, I thought Dean had gone too far. Now it reminds me of teens texting their friends who are walking next to them. Nothing vocal is exchanged. Only texts.

    Plus, how easy to think we are loved when folks we've never met want to be our friends. Really?

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  28. Now this feels familiar!
    Helen with the coffee pot (bless you) and Tina reminding us important things once more.
    What is we're supposed to talk about in our comments? Social Media?

    Well, that excludes me, I guess. No Facebook, No Twitter (although I was thinking about getting it at one point). Just the good all ones : meeting up face to face, the phone, the e-mail and commenting on blogs, I guess??

    I'm looking foward to seeing what what y'all have got to say about this post though!

    :-)

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  29. I do birds too, KAV. A finch feeder a bird feeder and squirrel feeder so they leave the birds alone. HAAAA!!

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  30. Helen W. Another favorite AUSSIE!!!!

    You will, Helen. We shall see each other at ACFW some day!!!!!

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  31. Blogs are different, Jillian. They are more intimate at least Seekerville is, but we are the exception to the norm.

    That's true on so many scary levels.

    Not my quote. It's from FB Detox.

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  32. And I have purchased books from blog posts. Especially guests in Seekerville.

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  33. We do Susan! Dr Susan that is.

    We rule from behind our messy desks.

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  34. Tina, great post. Over the last year, I have spent much less time on FB, and disengaged from Farmville (much to my husband's, and my schedule's, relief. I am on Twitter, but I don't do much there. It is so easy for days to be eaten up catching up with peoples' updates. I refuse to join Pinterest--I'd be addicted and what little time I have for writing would be squandered away admiring other peoples' creations.

    I agree with you about social media being the seasoning adding to my life, not my entire life.

    The link to the video about FB and the CIA--whoa. I can't believe how the reporter closed, with her comment about her fans (you quoted it). That definitely gives me pause to consider how involved I should be on social media.

    I think once I start my blog I'll focus time on that, more than FB or Twitter.

    That said, I have your book (LOVED IT!), and I will be at ACFW. I'd be honored to have the chance at an "awkward conversation" with you. :)

    Thanks for this post today, Tina.

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  35. Jackie, I noticed you are an RPh. I work with wonderful pharmacists myself. A great breed. Most of whom do not FB or Twitter. LOL.

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  36. Oh, Teenster, I am SOOO with you on this!!!

    Tempted to pull the plug on everything and am avoiding Pinterest like the plague ...

    Hugs,
    Julie

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  37. Honestly DebH, the ONLY reason I don't shut down FB is it's the only way I get to see my kids who are all over the world.

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  38. Hello Tina, I am a reader who follows this wonderful bunch of authors in Seekerville and I would love to win your book. I do have FB but have not joined Pintrest, I have a blog and I am on goodreads site. I play games a lot on FB and do check out the parties with authors that are fun and have met lot of people there one lived in neighboring city and we are now friends and play games together on FB, one day will go meet her in person. thanks for sharing today-I think people do spend too much time on MEdia, I hate to see young people with phones to their ears all the time or else punching with their fingers flying..they are missing out on life.
    Paula O(kyflo130@yahoo.com)

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  39. Tina, I love you even more. Didn't think that was possible, but today's post? Yep. Love you more.

    I'm so with you about the social media.

    I've talked about my children's books on our blog, other blogs, Facebook, etc. and have never sold one single book from those sources. So there.



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  40. Pol/Paula! Ain't it the truth. Don't you want to say, honey, unplug, THE REAL WORLD is passing you buy.

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  41. Hi Tina,

    Was going to comment buti have to go see if anyone has posted a new status updates the few minutes since I started reading here. If I find out why Julie Hilton Steele is Carol Moncado's new hero, I'll tweet the reason and then - oh wait, you're too busy handing out those fabulous diet tips to read a tweet! Kinda jealous. I thought I was the only one who got diet tips from you.

    Ack, see, now you made me talk to you and someone, somewhere posted something on FB and I missed it! Some friend you are!

    What's this thing you call writing? Is it longer than 140 characters? Maybe it uses twitlonger?

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  42. A family member who recently got off FB who looks suspiciously like my dtr said to me that she kept thinking of life in terms of FB Status updates.

    That's when she knew it was time to get off FB. She's been a recovering FB-aholic for 2 years now. She had thousands of friends.

    I am so proud of her for a successful rehab.

    Since coming clean she has traveled the globe.

    WOOT!!! WAY TO GO ANONYMOUS DAUGHTER!!!!!!

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  43. No, everyone got diet tips from me.

    Some folks thought they were real and let me know they wanted off my list.

    Sigh.

    Seriously in the scheme of things it is better and slightly less humiliating than sending VIAGRA ads to me editor and agent.

    And yet..

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  44. Ha! I'm loving this post, Tina! I mostly stick to blogging because that's where I've actually made relationships and that's where I really connect with people. Otherwise, I'm pretty boring, too, and I can't even figure out how to do my new timeline on Facebook so I figure it must not be that important :)

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  45. Tina, I so agree that social media shouldn't be used JUST to sell books. Those people get on my nerves. Social media is about relationships - connecting with your readers and fellow writers. The book selling is secondary. When someone drops "buy my book" links, but never takes time to be personal with you, I ignore their posts.

    As to the drawing, I would LOVE to be in the drawing for your book! :D

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  46. Tina, my daughter did the same thing. She said she was tired of fake friendships and only communicating with real friends online instead of face to face.

    She recently had to reactivate the account because of travel ( and the need to communicate with overseas hosts), but she did so very reluctantly.

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  47. Interesting topic, Tina! I've heard a lot of discussion from authors all over the place this past year, questioning the true value of some of these things. How time consuming they are and wondering what real "connection" they are actually making with readers when the majority of those "likes" and comments are coming from other published authors in an effort to "support" their own social media efforts.

    It's definitely something to consider when endeavoring to keep life somewhat in balance and carving out time for writing the kinds of books your readers will love.

    I like Seekerville because I feel we actually DO connect on a personal level with other writers and readers and establish true relationships.

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  48. Great post Tina. Wish I could chat with you at the conference, but I won't be able to make it this year. I guess I'll have to settle for the possibility of one of the other prizes. :)

    I guess I can breathe a sigh of relief about not being excessively active in social media.

    Blessings,
    Jodie Wolfe

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  49. (Cindy Wilson, AHHHH, I have not figured out the whole FB Timeline thing either. Seriously, I am sure we could do this. We are bright gals. BUT WHO HAS TIME????)


    Do you think God would do FB? Wouldn't that be a fun page??

    Gabriel and Michael assigned to Monday and Tuesday. God on Sunday of course. Jesus on Friday and the Holy Spirit Wed since it's hump day.

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  50. Remember the disclaimer..this is my opinion. You don't have to agree. But I know deep down inside most of us DO, but we want to sit at the cool table so we don't dare breathe a word.

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  51. I think the use of the word 'bottom line' after that ... ahem ... encouraging weight lost tweet you sent me is ill-avised.

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  52. Also I just learned more yesterday about facebook, turns out I'm doing ti all wrong and I'm scum.
    The scum I suppose I knew ... but the 'doing it all wrong' was pretty upsetting.

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  53. The Facebook timeline thing hasn't bothered me overly, mainly because I didn't know how to use Facebook before timeline so the change isn't that shocking.

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  54. I'd come for dessert, too, at ACFW, if it was okay. I don't want to interfere with you and a chance to make a new friend.

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  55. Alrighty, YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST.

    MARY SAID SHE IS BUYING!!!

    hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!

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  56. Helen Gray, I just realized you said ROAD TRIP!!!


    Remember to bring your camera!

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  57. Hi Tina,
    I am definitely a lurker. This is the first time I've posted a comment. I have been scouring this blog learning so much so thanks to all of you. Social Media has been a big scare factor for me. I wrote my first book before I got a facebook and struggling with my second it is the worst wormhole ever! Time just disappears. I actually got bullied on FB as well. I am a Christian and to my dismay did not realize there is this whole other genre of books. I hope to get my first inspirational novel soon.
    Thanks
    Jeri, Buena Park CA

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  58. Amen, Tina! I can't keep up with emails from friends and family, let alone all the promoting that happens on FB and Twitter.

    Not that I don't appreciate the invitation to "friend" as much as possible, but there's only so much I can do with my 1440 minutes a day.

    Thanks for doing the math, T.

    Day job gets in the way of my passion for writing, but day job also pays the bills. Hmm, not much leeway there.

    Truth to tell, I have a very needy husband who is also my very best friend. It's embarassaing to admit how easily I can be persuaded to chit chat with him in the shop or what watch some tv show do he doesn't work the "I'm lonely" face on me.

    Funny thing -- I've waited a loooong time for the kids to leave for college and careers. I've dreamed of uninterrupted writing time. No children fighting, no impromptu invitations to go shopping with daughter, no "what's for dinner, mom?"

    Ha, it's only now that I realize how much our kids kept my husband entertained, LOL!!

    Anyway, I hate to admit that I am the poorest participant in social networking.

    Thank you, Tina for lifting the burden of guilt over my ineffectiveness in this realm off my shoulders.

    It's a momentary relief. Some other guilt will scoot into the abdicated space shortly : )

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  59. And really? Where did this whole Pinterest thing come from?

    I'm avoiding it like the plague!!

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  60. Jeri!!!!! LURKER!!!!!

    Welcome!!

    Bullied. That's horrible.

    Well you are safe with us. We'll just ply you with chocolate and hugs.

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  61. Seriously, Audra! What is this. I thought I would have loads of free time when team sports, ballet lessons, teacher meetings ended. Where has all that time I was supposed to have GONE???

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  62. I'm a lurker too. :)

    marissamehresman(at)aol(dot)com

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  63. I don't mind buying, if you don't mind me hiding under the table through out the meeting.

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  64. I'm buying, but you are still going. You offered. And no mumbling.

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  65. WElCOME LURKER, MARISSA!!!!

    Glad we outed you.

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  66. Tina buying and Mary under the table. Hmm, could be an interesting meeting : )

    No texting allowed either...not that I know how to text.

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  67. Hi Tina,

    Glad I'm not the only one who finds all this social media stuff a bit overwhelming. I'm more of a lurker on FB, and I do not get Twitter at all! I've stopped going onto Twitter - I just so don't care about all the nonsense posted there. And I never have anything I want to 'tweet'. So good-bye.

    FB is better. The best part is people telling us about free Kindle downloads! For that reason alone, it's worth it!

    Please enter me for a copy of your book!

    PS. My life is more boring than yours!!

    Cheers,
    Sue

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  68. Ok, a word on Pinterest.

    I've heard a lot of writers use it for visuals on characters and there are ANTIQUE thigns on there for those of you who write historicals. Dresses, houses, furniture. Just for a writing help.

    But I LOVE Pinterest (well, I go on maybe once every few weeks) when I want to paint something, or have extra wood to use. I can go on a find tons of projects, pin them and then decide what fits. I just made a very cool trumeau (standing French mirror) from scrap wood and a Walmart crappy mirror), painted it antique turquoise then found a beautiful quote... All from ideas on Pinterest.

    If you're a visual person ir can be a great research tool!

    Tool is the operative word.

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  69. In all fairness to Twitter I have gotten alot of info from Twitter. And the Tweeting of the RWA gala was great. But how much info is too much info.

    And to really make Twitter effective it must come to your phone live. Otherwise you are missing 99percent of the info.

    I can't do Twitter live nor do I want to....so ....I must bail.

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  70. Pininterest is totally cool and visual and it's like the Sears Roebuck, Etsy.com and the Fall Vanity Fair and Ikea Catalog all at once. Sensory overload for me.

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  71. Virginia, you have time to write and do crafts?

    I had to give up crafting. I loved sewing. But I had to.

    I gave up cooking too.

    Cleaning...

    Wow, I really am down to the bare bones.

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  72. Ouh, allow me to welcome you to seekerville Jenny Hoag and Marissa!

    Jenny- so sorry to hear about you being bullied on FB. Seekerville is a good, cozy place to be. You'll see. :-)

    Blessings!

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  73. Oups.. that was supposed to be Jeri Hoag not Jenny..

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  74. Tina, you are PRECIOUS!!! I love the way you get major points across in a unique, humorous way. Facebook is my only social media (besides having a blog) and I HAVE to limit my time on there, or the entire day would zip by (and after all, besides writing to work on I MUST clean litter boxes...). ~ I already have (and LOVE!) Oklahoma Reunion, but please enter me in your drawing for the real time chat! Hugs from Georgia, Patti Jo

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  75. Ganise, you sweet thing. You are such a lovely hostess. Thank you!!!

    Helen makes coffee and Ganise takes our guests by the arm and shows them around.

    Then Patti Jo, slyly offers fresh pastries from Patti Jo's Cafe and Bakery.

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  76. Ganise, you sweet thing. You are such a lovely hostess. Thank you!!!

    Helen makes coffee and Ganise takes our guests by the arm and shows them around.

    Then Patti Jo, slyly offers fresh pastries from Patti Jo's Cafe and Bakery.

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  77. Figures this would be the day I would be away from the computer for most of the day.

    My daughter opted out of FB after her big heartbreak last year. She is back on with a select group of folks now. How many of us now have daughters who have opted out?

    This week I have been seeing people I normally only get a chance to communicate with through FB.

    You can't duplicate a hug from a live friend no matter how hard you try.

    But I do have a few FB friends who come pretty durn close with virtual hugs....

    Peace, Julie

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  78. Tina. I want that conversation at ACFW. I will short sheet Melissa Jagears bed to win it if I have to.

    What can I bribe you with?

    Hmmm...

    AHA! CHOCOLATE!!!!!

    Wait, random drawings can't be bribed, can they?

    Sigh.

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  79. Yes! Now I don't have to feel guilty about not being good at social media. Thank you for your words of wisdom. Back to writing I go.

    I'm not going to ACFW, but I wish I was.

    I don't think I'm a lurker, but maybe.

    I'm not one of the 3,000 who has already gotten a copy of your book, but I'd like a chance to win :)

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  80. Tina, you said:

    "Remember the disclaimer..this is my opinion. You don't have to agree. But I know deep down inside most of us DO, but we want to sit at the cool table so we don't dare breathe a word".

    And I thought THIS was the cool table! You know, the one the kids who THINK they're cool won't sit at? That's the really cool table.

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  81. I use facebook to connect with friends I've left behind in all our moves - and I love that part of it. I'm in touch with my college roommate again, a couple cousins I never see, and writer friends I hope to see in person one day...

    oh, and a game. One. I'm an addict.

    Texting. My kids added texting to the family account so they could text us and get us hooked. They are so into these gateway drugs.

    My husband refuses to answer or even read texts. I use texting like an answering machine.

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  82. LOL, gateway drugs. You are killing me.

    I had to up my text data. I am soooooo ashamed.

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  83. Julie, you keep getting cuter and cuter profile pictures. I am so jealous.

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  84. Short sheet Melissa's bed!!!!!

    So bad. I like that about you.

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  85. Okay, I'm caught. I'm mostly a lurker, so sign me up for the Amazon card.
    Thank you for the post encouraging us writers to do what we should - write. I can get overwhelmed with the promoting using social media that some say I'm "supposed" to do. But, you are so right - if I don't write, I will have nothing to "social media" about.

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  86. I'm kind of hard of hearing. So I don't mumble. I yell.
    It gets awkward.

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  87. For all of you going to the ACFW conference, have a wonderful time!!! Sniff, sniff, I wish I were going, but I'm afraid I can't this year. But I'll be there next year.

    Tina, I agree with you completely about social media. I enjoy writing -- and there are only so many minutes in a day.

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  88. Thanks, Tina. However, I have discovered my hair clashes with all the terra cotta out there this season. :-)

    Have to agree with Jan on the texting. Man O says "they can call". I am like "whatever."

    I think the next thing will be chips in our heads. I just know it.

    Peace, Julie

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  89. Did you just call yourself a pothead??

    JULIE!!!!!

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  90. :-) Thanks Tina!
    And I'm I the only who's always surprised at how comments roll in rapidly here??

    Whoa!
    My my, don't we all just LOVE Seekerville!

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  91. Sorry, that earlier comment was supposed to say:

    Ganise! We DO!!

    :-)


    All this social media talk has me hitting enter way too soon.

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  92. Tina, look at all these comments! I can't read them now (although I really, really want to) because real life calls -- and I like to answer :-) Will definitely come back this weekend to read the comments at leisure.

    Thank you, thank you for this post. You've put to words what I've been thinking ... which is really kind of scary, ya know?

    Nancy C

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  93. Now Tina, I bet you iron. Am I right??

    I think I get at least 65 extra hours a year just by not ironing.

    I'm going to try and make our house clothing optional. That might give me even more hours, if I have no laundry!

    Of course, hubby will still need work clothes, since he works with power tools. :O

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  94. Well Nancy, you're the first person to call me scary. Although Mary and Ruthy do occasionally call me strange. I consider that a compliment. Thank you.

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  95. I do iron occasionally but only for myself. I am not a recreational ironer.

    And never for inanimate object or the cats.

    I have never been caught ironing at speeds above the posted legal limits and I never smoke my iron.

    Is there a statistical correlation here or a psychological one?

    How do you know I iron and what are you going to do with information??

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  96. I'm already getting the box of chocolate at conference so I won't try to win the awkward conversation too, hehe.

    Tina, God bless you my friend. One of my favorite authors, Cliff Graham, just got a Pintrest account but how he delivered it via facebook was pretty funny. "The marketing people said I need this, so if it's your thing..." I mean, come on, they're filming the movie from his debut novel in Hawaii right now. I don't think social media (by the author) sells books. My friends talking about good books sells me books. I kicked and screamed my way back into Facebook to have SOME social media presence in addition to my blog (Which I LOVE now) but that's it. Like Cliff Graham, I will have to be forced into others by my publisher's marketing team. And my facebook isn't to sell my books. It's to build relationships. And when strangers friend request me, I refer them to my author page politely. I prefer authentic to numbers. That's just me. =)

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  97. I need to move to an author page, per the kind and detailed instructions of our guest blogger Sarah Ladd.

    I will get to this. I will. I will.

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  98. Tina, I use FB to spy I mean check up on family. without it I wouldn't know much at all. Even my niece's who used it all the time are not using as much now either. I have my settings at private and although I have friends to play games they dont see my status updates.

    It was actually from chatting with an Aussie aspiring author on fb chat we ended up starting the Australian Christian Readers Blog Alliance which was launched this month and will start touring books in November (http://acrba.blogspot.com) shameless plug.

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  99. From SPY to decorated reader hero.

    Way to go Jenny!!!

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  100. I don't do FB, but love Seekerville! I've read your book and loved it....do I count as a lurker for the gift card?!?! lol

    Jackie S.

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  101. Jackie S, you are in the draw.

    And loved it constitutes bonus points in case you need them at a later date.

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  102. Tina, I am more of a copper head but I can see where you would get that idea!

    Peace, Julie

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  103. It was a pun, hun.

    Terra Cotta + pots = pothead

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  104. Thank you, Mia Ross.

    Circle of Family arrived today. I've put it aside to await the arrival of Hometown Family, which I just ordered.

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  105. Blogs are my lurking preference.

    I would love to read "Oklahoma Reunion" thank & please count me in for the GC.

    marypres(AT)gmail(DOT)com

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  106. For some reason, I don't get your post updates until a day after they're out, so I'm about a zillion comments down. Still, had to poke my nose in and say that as much as I have resented being prodded (by my agent) to get onto Facebook and move beyond just my sailing blog, I've been having fun.

    I love being able to interact with remote family and old friends from other parts of the world. I'm not a salesperson, so the idea of trying to sell books this way seems a bit over-the-top, but I certainly enjoy getting to know other writers. I often buy their books, too, if they happen to fall into the genres I read.

    Demystifying social media, taking it out of the "must do" and allowing it to serve us instead of us serving it, sounds like a healthy use of the tools set before us. I appreciate all those links, Tina, and thank you for posting them.

    Those of us who serve the One Who has called us to write might do well to remember that if He calls, He will equip. And if He calls and equips, we don't need to fret about the outcome. We do with all our might that which our hands find to do, and then we trust Him with the outcome.

    What I see so often in writers who are trying to market their work is that frantic search for connection, that overwhelming cry of, "Please look at me. See what I've done," that speaks of our need for recognition. Still, as servants of the Lord, we must release all of that to Him, trusting that, as Terry Burns says, even if our work touches only an audience of one, and that one person's life is changed, then we will have accomplished much.

    A best seller? Will that make our life count for more? And will crowds touting us be worth more than the one person whose heart we touched?

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  107. Thank you so much for your post. What you said is so true. When I was trying to market my non-fiction book a while back, the person who helped market me swore that putting me in all the social media sites was a good idea and would translate into sales. Clearly it didn't. What it did do, however was to set me up with many "friends". Tell people you're an author and you suddenly get friends.

    I find the social media sites to be a time stealer, not to mention a usage stealer. If you have a 5GB air card, you can be sure that those sites will eat up your time.

    Oh and I would love to win one of the books since I won't be at the ACFW conference this year.

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  108. Thanks for the input Normandie and Kathy.

    I mentioned this on today's WE Comments..but IT Web designer husband pointed out to me that FB pages are not searchable by Google. So essentially your FB fans or friends are the only ones you are marketing to on FB. Which is fine, but that pretty much limits your reach.

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  109. And AMEN Normandie.

    If HE wants you to write it, to preach it, to tell it...HE will will open the doors too.

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  110. Would love to win your book (Traditional)and I love reading too

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  111. Tina, what a great post!! I LOVE it! Now I feel better. I'm not the only one who thinks, "I'm boring! What on earth do I have to share on FB and Twitter!" Thus, I don't engage much.

    Now if I can just get my blogging under control. That takes a good bit of my time.

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  112. By the way, I should add that I do love to get on Facebook and see what other people are doing. But that usually just validates how boring my life is! LOL

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  113. Tina,

    You're a woman after my own heart! Now, can you convince those editors and agents and publishers that FB is not the be all and end all??!!

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  114. I was at a writers conference just this past week and a publisher there said the exact same thing. Which is why I haven't checked the blogs I'm following until now.
    Yes, there is a limit and I need to get a life. Oh, yes I already have two lives - the day job and writing. So why do I need a social network life? Once a day a quick scan of things out there and it is back to writing for this homebody.

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  115. Tina, well put! I have most of the Social Media accounts, but only post information to them through article Share buttons. Having to be aware of and participate in ALL these marketing avenues definitely puts added stress to an already stressful life.

    I rarely spend any time on any of them. Just a click from a post I'm reading and that's it.

    The only network I found to be helpful is Linkedin, not for selling books though. As a freelance writer I've gotten queries and jobs through Linkedin.

    Thanks for voicing and doing what I'd love to do!

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  116. Thanks for the vote Karen,Edwina and Chris!!

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