Happy Friday, dear Seekerville!
Today, I (Carrie) have the privilege of hosting Laura Gallier, Christy Award winning author of The Delusion series. Laura has a heart for teenagers and creating awareness of the spiritual battles faced by this generation.
Welcome, Laura!
13 Reasons Why
Not:
Uncovering the
False Romanticizing of Serious Teen Issues
By Laura
Gallier
If you’re a teenager or the parent of one, you’ve likely heard of the Netflix original series 13 Reasons Why. In its first season, my 14-year-old daughter described the teen drama to me this way: “It’s about suicide, and lots of my friends are watching it, but Mom, it’s, like, making some of them depressed and stuff.”
The show’s theme centers around 17-year-old Hannah Baker, a suicide victim who leaves behind audio recordings for those she blames for causing her to want to die—13 people, to be exact. The show’s producers maintain they hope to shed light on the tragic issue of suicide, but various suicide prevention groups say it’s actually glamorizing suicide and putting teens at risk.1
I too have a heart for this cause, so much so that I chose teen suicide as the driving theme of my young adult novel series, The Delusion. But I come at it from an entirely different angle—a biblical, spiritual perspective that’s proven to change students’ minds about self-harm and suicide.
Parents, here are 13 reasons we can share with our teens concerning why they should resist the deception of romanticizing suicide and other serious teen issues:
The show’s theme centers around 17-year-old Hannah Baker, a suicide victim who leaves behind audio recordings for those she blames for causing her to want to die—13 people, to be exact. The show’s producers maintain they hope to shed light on the tragic issue of suicide, but various suicide prevention groups say it’s actually glamorizing suicide and putting teens at risk.1
I too have a heart for this cause, so much so that I chose teen suicide as the driving theme of my young adult novel series, The Delusion. But I come at it from an entirely different angle—a biblical, spiritual perspective that’s proven to change students’ minds about self-harm and suicide.
Parents, here are 13 reasons we can share with our teens concerning why they should resist the deception of romanticizing suicide and other serious teen issues:
👉 1. In 13 Reasons Why, Hannah blames her hopelessness and misery on her peers, calling out the specific ways they hurt her. While people will most certainly hurt and wound us at times, the Bible is clear there’s a deeper force working against us than mere humanity. We have a spiritual, demonic enemy that operates through broken humanity to inflict pain, thus our battle is not with people—even those who wound us—but rather, with the unseen forces of evil that seek to use people as a conduit to destroy us (Ephesians 6:12; John 10:10).
👉 2. The Bible is clear that upon death, we instantly leave Earth and reside in the realm of eternity forever (2 Corinthians 5:8). This means that if we commit suicide in an attempt to get even with people, gain attention, or make a name for ourselves, we will never catch the slightest glimpse of any such outcome—any earthly effect of our death whatsoever.
👉 3. The nature of deception is to be convinced certain lies are true, and therefore, certain truths are lies. Case in point, when we conclude our life is hopeless, we’ve bought into a cruel lie at the expense of the reassuring truth. God promises if we love Him, He’ll use every difficult thing we go through for our ultimate good (Romans 8:28), and He assures us He has a good plan for our life, to give us continual hope and a promising future (Jeremiah 29:11).
👉 4. Young people with little life experience sometimes overlook the reality that this too shall pass. We may have some extremely difficult days, months, or even years, yet such fulfilling and meaningful life experiences await us! In my own life, I grew up in a fatherless home and suffered painful circumstances throughout my childhood, but now, as an adult, I enjoy a thriving family life with my husband and children. I thank God I didn’t give up on life as a teenager!
👉 5. Why does the demonic world work night and day to try to steal our personal sense of being loved, accepted, and valued beyond measure, particularly by God? It’s so we’ll drown in lies, self-destruct, and ultimately never fulfil God’s purpose for our life. The truth is, Satan is scared we’ll live out our God-given destiny, which will bless others and work against his satanic agenda in the earth (Luke 22:31-32).
👉 6. Perspective shifts with time and maturity. Circumstances we deemed devastating in elementary school—perhaps getting made fun of for having a Disney Princess lunch box—tend to seem trivial when we get to high school and look back on the experience. (My 16-year-old daughter takes a Disney Princess lunch box to school to be lighthearted!) So, there’s a strong chance that someday, you’ll consider your current earth-shattering hardships to be no big deal—hardly worth despairing over.
👉 7. When we’re feeling discouraged and depressed, the tendency is to buy into the lie that there’s no one who cares, but that’s never true! Think about it: there’s always at least one parent or guardian, a friend, a student pastor or school counselor—someone who would genuinely care if we opened up about our situation and shared our internal struggle. What’s more, God says, “Do not be afraid or terrified . . . for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6, niv).
👉 8. Often times the circumstances that are causing us the most distress and grief are not even remotely what we believe them to be. The darkest, most trying life season I ever walked through turned out to be the result of a major communication breakdown (and my own paranoid assumptions) that caused me to feel rejected and abandoned when nothing could have been further from the truth. It’s far better to communicate and get to the truth of a matter than self-destruct over a lie.
👉 9. I have friends who have suffered great losses and injustices, such as seeing a parent murdered or being betrayed by a best friend. I’ve witnessed those same people walk gracefully through the grieving process and go on to flourish in life because they relied on God’s grace and experienced the power of forgiveness found only in Christ. As the Bible says, “[God] heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3, niv).
👉 10. 13 Reasons Why shows the harm bullying can do, but a biblical perspective helps us understand that hurting people hurt people, thus the bully is a troubled person in need of help himself or herself (Matthew 5:43-44).
👉 11. As depicted in the Delusion series, abusive teen dating relationships greatly increase a young person’s likelihood of committing suicide,2 so do not tolerate verbal or physical abuse in the name of “love.” In seeking to transform an unhealthy boyfriend or girlfriend, we become unhealthy ourselves.
👉 12. Depressing thoughts trigger the release of neurotransmitters that have a negative effect on our mental and emotional state that can result in a full-blown chemical imbalance (i.e., chemical depression). Using prescription meds to bring our chemicals back into balance may be helpful in some situations, but the ultimate solution is to renew our thoughts so that they align with the truth about the hope we have in Christ (Romans 12:2).
👉 13. Prayer and faith have proven to combat the negative effects of depression,3 not just because those acts, in and of themselves, bring hope, but because there’s a mighty God who responds to our faith and prayers, working to protect us from the evil one and reveal His unfailing love to us, which casts out all fear! (1 John 5:14-15; 1 John 4:18).
👉 7. When we’re feeling discouraged and depressed, the tendency is to buy into the lie that there’s no one who cares, but that’s never true! Think about it: there’s always at least one parent or guardian, a friend, a student pastor or school counselor—someone who would genuinely care if we opened up about our situation and shared our internal struggle. What’s more, God says, “Do not be afraid or terrified . . . for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6, niv).
👉 8. Often times the circumstances that are causing us the most distress and grief are not even remotely what we believe them to be. The darkest, most trying life season I ever walked through turned out to be the result of a major communication breakdown (and my own paranoid assumptions) that caused me to feel rejected and abandoned when nothing could have been further from the truth. It’s far better to communicate and get to the truth of a matter than self-destruct over a lie.
👉 9. I have friends who have suffered great losses and injustices, such as seeing a parent murdered or being betrayed by a best friend. I’ve witnessed those same people walk gracefully through the grieving process and go on to flourish in life because they relied on God’s grace and experienced the power of forgiveness found only in Christ. As the Bible says, “[God] heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3, niv).
👉 10. 13 Reasons Why shows the harm bullying can do, but a biblical perspective helps us understand that hurting people hurt people, thus the bully is a troubled person in need of help himself or herself (Matthew 5:43-44).
👉 11. As depicted in the Delusion series, abusive teen dating relationships greatly increase a young person’s likelihood of committing suicide,2 so do not tolerate verbal or physical abuse in the name of “love.” In seeking to transform an unhealthy boyfriend or girlfriend, we become unhealthy ourselves.
👉 12. Depressing thoughts trigger the release of neurotransmitters that have a negative effect on our mental and emotional state that can result in a full-blown chemical imbalance (i.e., chemical depression). Using prescription meds to bring our chemicals back into balance may be helpful in some situations, but the ultimate solution is to renew our thoughts so that they align with the truth about the hope we have in Christ (Romans 12:2).
👉 13. Prayer and faith have proven to combat the negative effects of depression,3 not just because those acts, in and of themselves, bring hope, but because there’s a mighty God who responds to our faith and prayers, working to protect us from the evil one and reveal His unfailing love to us, which casts out all fear! (1 John 5:14-15; 1 John 4:18).
Book two in the
Delusion series, The Deception, is
released this month! Get both books in the series on Amazon and at other book
retail outlets. Learn more about Laura at LauraGallier.com.
1. http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/13-reasons-faces-backlash-suicide-prevention-advocacy-groups/story?id=46851551
2. http://www.loveisrespect.org/resources/dating-violence-statistics/
3. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/more-mortal/201406/5-scientifically-supported-benefits-prayer and http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2314781/Believing-God-help-treat-depression.html
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
You can also connect with Laura on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.
Praise for The Delusion Series:
“I encourage you to read The Delusion. It triggers your imagination about the realities of spiritual warfare.” —Jase Robertson, Duck Dynasty
What about you? Which of these points most resonated with you? How can you incorporate these principles in your writing?
Comment below for a chance to win a print copy of The Deception (US only)
Laura, these points resonant with me, but especially hurting people hurt people. This is so true! Would love to win a copy of your book. There's a young person in my life who's mother has stated she's contemplated suicide and when she's struggling, does self-harm. Your book and message is so timely and just want young people need to hear.
ReplyDeletePraying for this struggling young person, Sally!
DeleteHi Laura, before I had my children I was the Executive Director for an overnight crisis shelter for street kids in a medium sized city. We were a Christian organization and I've seen (also in my career as a police officer) desperate and depressed teens many times over. Mental illness, abuse, family dysfunction, and addictions all played a role in why these kids "ran away" or chose to live on the streets, often traveling from city to city when they could. This was before social media and the huge power of peer pressure that has raised over teens living with these things. I've seen real evil and I know it exists. I also know God works through people who are open to His leading and His will, to heal the hurting. I especially like your points #11 and #12: counselling young teen girls to recognize abusive boyfriends was a regular occurrence in my job, and #12 chemical depression can only be relieved through medication. Once the brain has gotten some relief and the person can start to think straight again, they'll have a chance to come close to God and begin healing through hope in Jesus. Thank you for sharing such an in depth look at what teens face today because it's not just "street kids", it's every day kids in our churches and schools. We need to educate ourselves as parents to be aware of the signs and symptoms of depression and suicidal ideation in our kids.
ReplyDelete"Once the brain has gotten some relief and the person can start to think straight again, they'll have a chance to come close to God and begin healing through hope in Jesus." - Yes! This was so true of my own battle with anxiety & depression.
DeleteMyself as well, Carrie. God works through people and medication to heal us, as well as His holy Spirit. It's no different than being a diabetic and needing insulin.
DeleteAmen to that!
DeleteHi Laura!
ReplyDeleteYour series is needed in our world! Thank you for writing it! Your 13 points were enlightening and reassuring. So often, the media only highlights the tragedy of teen suicide without giving a hint to a solution. Giving biblical solutions through the powerful medium of story is wonderful.
I'm looking forward to reading both books, Laura. This is definitely your calling.
ReplyDeletei agree!
DeleteThank you so much Laura for writing these books! Our teens are inundated with such negativity and evil on a daily basis. When I look at the bookshelves in the stores at what our teens and youth are being offered, there is nothing "good" there (at least in the handful of titles I've scanned, but maybe that's because I haven't seen any of the CF titles there...), and nothing that offers them hope.
ReplyDeleteBut God.
May He bless you as you seek to reach our young people for Him! Lee-Ann (PS Don't enter me in the draw as I'm in the Great White North).
"But God" - yes!
DeleteLaura, you've provided such a positive way to counter the 13 Reasons show. It breaks my heart to think of the many ways teens can be negatively influenced by watching those episodes. Shame on the producer and director. Our youth are so vulnerable...
ReplyDeleteA few years ago, I started a group that meets each Monday and prays for Children@Risk, children throughout the world, especially our teens and young adults. They are always on my heart!
I thought of you & your Children@Risk prayers while I was putting this post together, dear Debby!
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