A Personal Note and Tips for Adding Vivid Detail

Hello everyone, Winnie Griggs here. I hope you'll excuse me while I indulge in a bit of personal reflection before I get to the actual writing-related part of this blog..

My son got married this past Saturday, and it was an absolutely beautiful celebration. The bridal party included, among others, my three daughters and the bride's sister as bridesmaids, one of my son-in-laws as a groomsman, my two grandsons as ushers and my other son-in-law, a preacher, performed the ceremony, so it was very much a family affair.

The ceremony itself was biblically based, with wonderful touches of personalization and light humor sprinkled in.  My sister, who is a cake artist, made both the wedding and groom's cakes (transporting them from her home nearly 300 miles away!)

And after much praying (and yes, worrying!) my foot decided to cooperate enough to let me walk down the aisle with only the aid of my grandson's arm, and better yet, have the mother-son dance with my son (though we did more swaying and shuffling than actual dancing :) )

And, of course, I just have to share a few pictures. Note: These are candid shots captured by various attendees so the clarity is not always of the best, but the emotion depicted is genuine :)

And now on to the writing portion of this post!

When crafting a scene, one key task for the writer is to make certain the reader can visualize the ‘where’ and ‘what’ surrounding and infusing your action.   How do you do that?  By focusing on the details of course. 

As writers, we all aspire to create a compelling emotional response and a clear mental picture that will stay with readers long after they finish the last page.  Memorable characters and powerful scenes are achieved through vivid writing. 

But what is vivid writing?  You may recognize it when you see it, but do you know how to create those same distinct images on the pages of your own manuscript?

Here are some things to think about when crafting (or editing) your scenes that I believe will help you start on the path to more vivid writing.

ENVIRONMENT

• What is the weather/temperature/climate
• What kind of lighting is present
• What time of day is it
• What time of year is it

SETS

• If your character is indoors :
• What is the type and size of the room/enclosure she is occupying?
• How is it furnished?
• If your character is outdoors:
• What is the terrain (hilly, marshy, rocky, lush, dusty, etc)?
• What plants, insects, animals, structures are visible?
• If your character is in a vehicle
• What is the type of vehicle?
• Is it well maintained or falling apart?
• Is it still or in motion?
• What view of the outside world is available?
• What is the look and feel of the interior?
• What are the occupants’ comfort level?

ATTIRE  Think of your characters’ garments in the following terms:

• Fit - are they restrictive, flowing, form-fitting, oversized
• Fabric - is the touch smooth or textured, does it rustle, scratch, caress, is it heavy or light
• Condition - are they new, old, torn, worn, clean, soiled, crisp, limp, wrinkled
• Style - would the look be described as classic, chic, dated, formal, casual, businesslike
• Color - bright, muted, flashy, print, solid, clashing, coordinated
• Accessories - hats, handbags, belts, jewelry, shoes, gloves

USE OF FIVE SENSES

• What can each character see?
• What can each character hear?
• What can each character smell?
• What can each character taste? (don’t forget - this can be internal, such as bile rising in the throat or blood from a cut lip)
• What can each character physically feel/touch

PHYSICAL PRESENCE

• Where are the characters in relation to each other? Did you remain true to this throughout the scene ? (i.e.: he can’t see that she’s wrinkling her nose if her back is to him)
• How would you describe their general appearance
  • Do they appear neat, disheveled, comfortable?
  • Are they wearing make-up, glasses, five o’clock shadow?
  • Is their hair up, slicked back, braided, loose?
• Speech patterns and tone
  • Is your characters’ voice soft, abrasive, throaty, sibilant, whiny?
  • Do they use colloquialisms, clichés, ostentatious words, catch phrases?
• Are they exhibiting any nervous/unconscious mannerisms?
• What are they doing with their upper body - hand gestures, fingers drumming, head movements, facial expressions, stiff-backed posture, slumped shoulders, bobbing adam’s apple, heaving chest?
• What are they doing with their lower body - sitting, crouching, limping, pacing, legs crossed, legs swinging, foot tapping?
• Which character dominates the stage? Can the scene be improved if someone else took the spotlight?
• Who is your Point Of View character? Can the scene be improved by changing this?

EMOTIONS

• What emotions are each of your characters experiencing inwardly?
• What emotions are each of your characters expressing outwardly?
• How attuned is each character to the emotions and nature of the other characters around him/her?

MISC

• Is there something you can do to heighten the physical awareness/sexual tension of this scene?
• Can you throw bigger obstacles at your characters or otherwise heighten the conflict in this scene?
• Is there any foreshadowing you can do of the secrets your characters are hiding, or of pivotal scenes to come?
• Have you made the best word choices to provide the pacing and convey the mood, level of tension and nuances of character you desire?

Caution:  You won’t need, or even want, to use every element on the list in each scene.  Rather, carefully pick those nuggets that are most significant to the particular scene you are working on, providing the punch and nuances you wish to convey.   

Once you’ve selected the details you wish to use, you must determine how to reveal them.  Your goal should be to weave them into the story in such a way as to maximize their impact without slowing the pace.  
A few techniques to consider are listed below:

Unfold the setting through your character’s action. 
Most people don’t enter a new environment and absorb everything immediately.  Just so, don’t stop the action of your scene by dumping in a block of description all at once.  Let your character notice things as he moves across the stage: how he must step around the massive planter as he crosses the patio, how her finger leaves a trail across the dusty desk, how uncomfortable he is negotiating around the knick-knack cluttered room.

Filter the setting through your character’s background and life experiences.
Would a ten year old be more likely to focus on the style of furniture in the room or on the collection of antique toys just out of her reach?  When a techno-geek enters a hotel room, will he look first for the view from his balcony or the computer connectivity options?

Color the setting through your character’s emotions and senses.
Is your character happy, afraid, bitter, heartbroken, in pain?  Those emotions will influence how he perceives the things around him.  For instance, the same rainstorm can be viewed by two people, but one sees it as a disaster because it means a cancelled outing, while the other views it as a godsend because it ends a drought that could have spelled financial disaster.  In the same way, the scent of a particular perfume can evoke cherished memories of a lover, or painful memories of an abusive parent.

There you have it.  Apply these techniques to your scenes and you’ll be on your way to making each one a sensory delight for your readers. 

So what do you think - was this checklist helpful? Do you have a checklist of your own that you use? Please do share.  And I'll be giving away a copy of the rerelease of my book The Christmas Journey, part of a new 2-in-1 collection from Love Inspired, to one person who leaves a comment on this post.